it hurts. - Childhood idols.

One of the most vital topics that I would like to discuss. Imagine this situation (many have obviously been through it):

- You're a little kid. You've just gotten to know the internet and everything seems interesting to you. When you go to YouTube, you see a cool YouTuber who you start to like. You like the humor in the video or whatever, you like how the video is made and what an interesting topic it has. This is an example, here's another one. You like a book, fanfic or comic for its plot, maybe you like the accompanying illustrations and want to know more about who the writer or artist is. All these works have turned your head and you have become obsessed with the author of everything. You follow his social networks and try to communicate. You are a STUPID child who supports the author in everything, respects his opinion, because he is your favorite, but this does not last long. You start to grow up and become less interested in this person, in any case, you remember him very well. 

- You've grown up, you now have different tastes, but everything that was before remains and you periodically return to your roots. One day you go online and see a video where your childhood idol is mentioned, but everything they say about him is unflattering. You hear about his real ego, how greedy he was, how in his last video he called his audience shit eaters, it's upsetting. You start discussing this topic and now he is not the same as he was before. But it's not so painful that I can translate it further. Among a bunch of random people and your friends, you find out that your idol was doing bad things. He committed indecencies or violence against those who were smaller and younger. It was as if he fucked children or animals, beat them, or maybe did it to his younger relatives. You start to hate him and perhaps wish him dead. You start asking yourself, "How could I watch this asshole?" - More traumatic - your dreams. Watching this person, you admired and wanted to be as cool as him. Either way, you start your YouTube business and make cool videos. When you are asked "Which YouTubers did you like to watch?" - you are terribly ashamed to say that you watched HIM. Back to the present day, this person who was accused is now attacking others and accusing them, roughly speaking, turning on the protagonist mode.

 The idea for this post didn't just pop up out of nowhere. My friends and I remembered a YouTuber who did voiceovers. He turned out to be a pedophile, but fortunately, what I listed above, he did not do this. He limited himself to touching in awkward places. Later I remembered a bunch of other YouTubers I watched, but they turned out to be real assholes. Most of them are not very popular now, in any case, they were just being mean to their audience.

The whole situation I described is like a Penelope Scout song...

You dumb bitch!!!

I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it’s true

I wanted to be you and do what you do

I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it’s true

I’m so embarrassed, I feel abused