relationships rant

ranting again hihihi

nowadays, ive been rlly desperate??? or like, fantasizing a lot???? abt having a partner :((

idk if its bc i just finished 'the dangers in my heart' or if im just experiencing fomo from all the couples in my school (prob the latter,, T_T) but ive been craving and burning to be held by a maAAAaaaAn!!!

bc of this ive been developing infatuations toward some ppl at my school and it freaking SUCKS!!!!

i feel so disgusting bc i know nothing abt these ppl!!! its purely superficial!!!!

the worst part is that i have a feeling that id be a terrible partner and i think thats whats stopping me from confessing/pursuing my crushes (+ my low self esteem) but at the same time i wanna at least experience being in a relationship before i graduate school :((

my friend suggested that i try out an online rs but it kinda feels wrong dont u think? T_T im genuinely considering it a bit tho but like 'trying someoen out' feels so wrong

idk mann

anywayz

cake4 out ε=ε=┏( >_<)┛