10262024 • hyperfixation hell - rant!

soooo you know the drill of hyperfixations (at least if you’re gonna be reading this)… you get into a piece of media, think its cool, and suddenly its apart of your entire life for how knows long? 

i have such a love/hate relationship with hyperfixations SIMPLY BECAUSE it is a hyperfixation. which, okay, sounds SO STUPID. but the fact i can’t enjoy any of my interests normally because i’m hyperfixating on something is soo frustrating for me

my current hyperfixation is mha, which OH MY GOSH. i wish the 2020 fandom didn’t make everyone think of mha so freaking horribly because it is nott a bad show and as i got into the fandom, literally no one acts like how people perceive them to be. everyone i’ve met are literal sweethearts, but to be fair, i only interact with teenagers as i am one myself… some of the adults i’ve came across are a bit odd but they’re none of my business. ANYWAYS JUST WANTED TO PUT THAT IN. 

like out of all the hyperfixations i’ve had throughout the years, holy fuck, this one is crazy. it’s been the only thing i’ve been able to think about since i got back into it (which was july) and there hasn’t been a day where i haven’t thought abt it. i’ve made loads of fanart, and many other things because the hyperfixation hell is just TOO SERIOUS. 

thankfullyyyyyy my irls have been really good abt it…. when i had a previous hyperfixation they were a teensy bit mean abt it BUT I JUST TALKED ABT IT EXCESSIVELY. but alsoooo what i’ve learned last year was not talking about it just makes it worse and whenever i talk about mha i feel a lot better!!!!! i got my friends back into it and IM SO GLAD I CAN TALK TO PEOPLE ABOUT MY FAVE THING RN!!!!!!!!!

okay, assuming more people can understand what i mean when i said i feel a lot better when i talk about ittt, it feels so freeing. i’m gonna try to like have a metaphorical thing here so BEAR WITH ME!!! it’s like a itch for me i guess. i think about it 24/7 and when i don’t talk about it its kind of just itching at my brain but when someone lets me talk about it the itch is out and i feel really happyy!!! (guys i don’t know WHAT i have but i need to get diagnosed with something, whatever it is, BADLY.) 

but before i got back into mha i told myself i would wait for school to end to watch it because i KNEW i would start hyperfixating on it. guys, i took precautions and i was right LMFAO. it took me a week to watch all of the anime and read the manga, which OH MY GOSH. chapter 424, “for the rest of our lives?” KILL ME. 

OKAY SORRY I GOT REALLYL OFF-TOPIC FROM THE REASON I MADE THIS ENTRY. i have a love/hate relationship with having hyperfixations simply because i can’t be normal about it. for instance, i think last week in school me and one of my irls were talking and i mentioned my art and it was something mha related (?) i think i started talking about the manga very vaguely and the person next to them (which im friends with!) chimed in and we started talking abt final-war arc. AND OKAY. I SHOULD’VE KNOWN NOT TO TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE WHENEVER I HEAR TAKES ABOUT FINAL WAR I GET UPSET. media illiteracy is a crime and i truly hate tiktok manga-readers. 

we first started talking about the manga ending and i forgot specifically what happened after but we were talking about the epilogue i think the person said like, “none of the fights were recorded” and i told them, “urm, they were all recorded BESIDES ochako’s.” BECAUSE THEY WERE. the whooleee thing about ochako post-war was the fact no one knew how himiko saved her. she felt guilty about everything that happened and wished things could’ve been different. ALL THE OTHER FIGHTS WERE RECORDED, which was shown ESPECIALLY IN THE ANIME. 

once i told them that and they were like, “erm no. all of the hero-students didn’t get credited etc…” and then i was like “yeah they did………” THEN THEY KEPT SAYING THINGS THAT WEREN’T TRUE LIKE HOW DID YOU COME TO THIS CONCLUSION. and okay, i would’ve understood if they thought this because of that monoma panel BUT THEY EVEN SAID MONOMA WASN’T CREDITED. guys im gonna scream, everyone was credited in the warrrrrrrrr. the whole debate about izuku, katsuki and all the other 1A students not being credited or getting their statues is so stupid because please use context clues. why WOULDN’T izuku be credited? he was the biggest asset to the final war. monoma’s biggest thing when the final war started was he was glad he was going to make the history books. FUCK THEY WERE ALL CREDITED OKAY THATS WHAT I’M TRYING TO GET AT HERE. 

they were sooo stuck on their ways and whenever i tried to tell them that wasn’t right they just didn’t listen to i had to do the worse thing ever; AGREE TO WHAT THEY WERE SAYING. guys my blood was boiling and i had to just leave the conversation afterwards because i was so upsetttttttt like okay, i don’t have a problem with people getting things wrong but then GETTING THINGS WRONG AND ACTING LIKE IM WRONG, PLUS LIKE YOU KNOW IT BETTER THAN ME HAD ME FOAMING. and its not like they don’t know im hyperfixated on it toooooo im gonna sobbbb…..

i post very extensive stories on my instagram cfs and they’re on there!!! so i literally. do not know why and WHERE they got all this information from LMFAO. i ended up being pissed the entire day because holyy shittt like what is going on. and its such a petty thing to be upset about WHICH MADE ME MORE MAD. thats what i don’t like about hyperfixations. 

what i DO love is how i can forget about everything elseeeeeee!! which sounds quite unhealthy but when i don’t have a hyperfixation, i feel so empty. i get insanely depressed and i feel like i cant do anything. if i don’t have something to dedicate my time to, i feel horribleeeeeee so when i do, ITS THE BEST!! especially the joy when you’re first hyperfixating on something new!! like i’m not sure how to explain it, i get this HUGE RUSH. like literal jitters. my fingers get all tingly and i feel super unstill, which mightttt sounds like i needed to stim as i’m typing this BUT OKAY,,,,,

i also get really creative when i’m hyperfixating on something, especially with this one rn. THERES SO MUCH POTENTIAL ON FAN-CONTENT, ESPECIALLY WITH THE EPILOGUE!!! and i giggle everytime i have a new idea because what is my mind and WHY is it cooking.

what i DONTTT LIKE AGAIN THOUGH is when you know the hyperfixation is going to run out (?) and its starting to feel emptyyyyyy… i realized as typing this i probably don’t have seasonal depression and more like “post hyperfixation emptiness?” guys can we PLEASE start making that a thing because goodd lordddd…..

this is getting really long FUCK. i just really like talking about my fave things and mha is one of my fave things!! if anyyonee doesssss read this and likes mha or just cool art, follow me on twitter!!! (@ochapilled!) its mha-centric but i post art frequently! i am making an art-only pinterest though and i’ll start linking that here in the blog entires… OKAY BYE!!!