Feelings….

Do you know that feeling where you know something bad is going to happen? That feeling that makes your stomach hurt and your throat close up? That feeling that makes you tell your family you love them before you sleep, just to wake up the next morning and everything is fine. It’s fine. Your fine. EVERYTHING IS FINE… until it isn’t and you’re sitting in the cold hardwood floor of your lonely house with no one to help. Watching as your blood leaks onto the floor from your skin that you so carelessly DESTROYED out of your own selfishness, knowing you can’t ask for help because there is no point and never will be. The feeling of happiness, your purpose lift and leave your body. The feeling of your life leave the world behind. The feeling of comfort that it brings as your loved ones hold your lifeless body close to themselves as they wait for someone to try and help you. The feeling of happiness as you watch your least favorite teacher tell your class you took your life the night before. The feeling of GUILT as you watch your family and friends blame themselves. You begin to regret your choice. You miss your friends. You miss your family, your bed, your pets, your body… you wake up. And just as you had said before, you’re fine. It was all just ONE bad dream.