Deja vu dream

Okay so since like middle school I've been having this reoccurring dream like once a year. It's never the same exact dream, just a dream with the same general script and twist.

What'll happen is that I'll wake up (in the dream) and go along with my morning like usual until I need to pack a bag (because I always need to pack a bag in these dreams), and I only ever pack the same few things. A cheap soft cover notebook, a small unopened pack of marker pens, a soda and a generic candy bar.

Then I'll leave my room, something crazy happens (like there's a crazy natural disaster or an apocalypse) And my first instinct is to go tell someone, but I then stop and realize that there's no point because this is a dream. Then the script branches, I'll now either continue the dream with the subconscious knowledge that I'm dreaming, or I'll consciously realize that I'm in a dream and I'll wake up again (in another dream)

If I don't consciously realize, then I'll usually just play out some really generic script where I die before the end of the day.

But in this dream^2, I usually have no idea I'm actually dreaming. This dream feels completely normal, and honestly, that's why it kinda scares me. Sometimes I'll live in this dream for days, months, hours. Once I lived in this dream for 10 years. I'd graduated, got a good job, met someone I loved, and had the cutest little girl.

I was devised when I woke up. Like it felt like someone actually just killed my husband and ripped my child from my cold dead arms. And all I could think when I woke up was "wtf, give me my kid back" but midway through the day all I could think about was the hypothetical; that I was still dreaming and that everything that I'm experiencing now and have been experiencing since the 7th grade has all been nothing more than a sick dream my minds made up to mess with me.