I can't stop thinking about 'No longer Human'

My first introduction of this book was reading Junji Ito's adaptation of the same novel. And At first, i did enjoy it, don't get me wrong. (i did thought the sex/assault scenes every three pages full colored, 40k was a little too unnecessary but whatever) but Dazai didn't die for this. Yesterday mid-red, i decided to hunt the book down in any bookstore in my radius with Nirvana playing in the background. I reached Barnes & Noble and once the associate helped and placed the book in my hands with froth in my mouth. Once i sat in my car seat and able to fully process this book was in my hands, i started to read. The last time i fully read a chapter book was almost two years ago with The Secret History by Donna Tart which left me exhausted (it's a really good book tho). I have had my fix by reading shorter stories or comic books but it never helped with my reader's block. But this goddamned book, this fucking book did it for me. This book slapped me and woke me up. 

I haven't finished the book but have you ever had a feeling, a concept stuck in your mind but somehow someone else manage to put those exact feelings into words? Thats what the book is for me. I know that each and everyone of us will have different views towards the book and how we relate to it. I have always been 'wrong', something didn't click in my genotype, leaving me empty and unable to miss connecting with my peers. I had the misfortune of inheriting my Father's depression and the role of becoming, sort of a therapist for him. Not only i had to deal with my own depression but hear and carry the woes of my dad as he took me to elementary. Like Oba, I didn't feel 'intact' as if i missed this big secret that everyone around me knows but I don't. And like many people, i didn't receive the help i feel would worked for me and continue to screw my way around life with the hope that everything is going to be okay.

It's amazing how this japanese male author from the 40's managed to perfectly put into words how this seven year old mexican-american girl felt. And i love how so many people can read this book and feel seen. How there is millions of people similar to me. How this small book can make people from different part of this wonderful and cruel world connect with each other despite never meeting them.