Solitude

Ever since i lost 2 of my closest friendships due to toxicity, I've been in solitude for about 9 months and almost pushing for a year, at first i was beating myself up for it and self blaming for things i did not even do. It was so difficult at first tho being by myself most of the time i just was in my room barely left the house but then i decided to take daily night walks where i am all alone by myself in the park and enjoying the view of the sea and the city from a long distance i felt relieved somehow each day i started to reflect on myself and on life, learning to love and appreciate myself i no longer became attached to the ones that left my life. For the first time ever i felt brave enough to survive by my own i feel stronger now and not needing anyone to keep me happy because the only way i can is from within and not from someone else. 

Either way i am an introvert and most people drain my energy it's only few who can keep me energetic when i am around them and i've learned from the past year till now that you do not have to be with someone that does not appreciate you or does not respect your emotions at all , especially if you yourself try to make things work but getting constantly blamed is just a sign to drop specific people even if they are close to you. You just never know what their intentions are.