my first blog entry,, i guess

i'm in an interesting place in life again. idk what to call it, it's not a crossroads, but i am faced with a lot of decision-making. i'm in the process of becoming. myself i guess. the self is such a crazy idea though, right? like we (human beings) have who we are, we have our thoughts, our actions, our desires and we may or may not claim these based on whether or not we feel they have harmony with the thoughts, actions, and desires we want to have. but that's a desire in itself. WANTING TO BE A PERSON IS A DESIRE ITSELF. so who is the true us? how do we explore this idea? i try to find answers to this question in Jaeggi and her work on alienation. She explores Harry Frankfurt and his idea of first and second-order volitions. This doesn't seem to work for her though, and it doesn't work for me either. When a ranking system is the method for understanding desires, it it possible to eternally increase ranks. this is to say that, using frankfurt's model for alienation and desire, one might end up endlessly placing one desire above another above another above another but will never get closer to a truer self. i still have difficulty here though, trying to piece out how a true self may be reached, or what it would mean to reach that since human beings must be always in flux. how can there be a true self when the self in constantly changing? for now, i do not know. Maybe something about harmony and marsha linehan. who is to say.

done for now

Izzy <3