Accidentally made something really sad

For my art class we were told to do an artwork inspired in a poem or song that has to do with the season of autumn. When I was told this I inmidiatly thought about "we fell in love in october" by girl in red and started sketching and thinking of how I'd be doing it. For some reason none of my sketches convinced me, none of them seemed good enough. 

I overheard a friend of mine talking with my teacher about the song he had chosen, I quickly realised we had chosen the same song, I wasn't surprised, I know a lot of people in my class have similar music taste as mine. I was curious so I walked up to his seat to check out his sketches. 

It was beautiful, a girl made of smoke or clouds in the sky why the clouds curving similar to the starry night. I told him how awesome his sketch was and that I also was doing the song, but on the inside I was extremely jealous. Everyone around me seemed to be having such great ideas and projects and everything I did looked like trash in my eyes.

When I got home that day, I decided I'd look for a different song, maybe that'd help me come up with a better idea. What I did not know was tta Girl in red published another song called October Passed Me By, which seemed to be a continuation of We Fell In Love In October. Since I didn't really know any other songs about fall that weren't halloween ones, I gave it a listen. The song was sad, talked about a break up and distancing from the girl the singer liked.

When I started sketching, I tried to think of those girls who I had an interest in when I was younger, but out of fear, or just because I didn't see myself ready, they never evolved into anything, in other words, I've never dated a girl (I'm still bisexual tho lol, just a loser bisexual).

I listened to the song on repeat trying to think of those girls forgetting what the song was actually about in the first place. A break up with someone you still hold dear.

That is something I was more than familiar with, and so in my last sketch tonight, I found what I'd be working on art class tomorrow. It's a drawing, with all sorts of presents that I recieved from past relationships and friendships, that with the pass of time are slowly leaving me behind and moving on, wether for the worst or for the best, life usually works that way.

I always found it really painful looking at pictures, videos, gifts from people who later wronged me or just stopped talking to me. The memory of what once was.

In the drawing, all the presents are being hugged by dry tree branches and dry roots coming from the floor and the walls. The room is also adorned with autumn fallen leaves, some of which have fallen on the presents.

Without noticing I imagined an artwork that means everything to me, the most important people in my life, the happiest moments passing me by, and furthermore, accepting that their time has come.

Anyways this isnt my usual post I will now go back to being silly and shit :P