Album Review Dump #2

Car Seat Headrest - Twin Fantasy (0/10)

There are honestly a billion ways I could go in talking about how bad this is, probably entirely unnecessarily; so I'll be brief.

1. Will Toledo is not good at making pop music. There is basically no harmonic or melodic direction or variation here. The arrangements are also poor and add nothing at all to the music. He also knows basically nothing about structure and dynamics. It's all sudden and jarring. No tension. "okay so this thing happens and then this part happens and then" that's boring. I don't want to listen to music that's just "and then this and that and that". And I'm not saying you needed 4000 dissonant ninth extension chords to make good music- but for gawd's sake use chords other than major or minor ones!

2. The songs are TOO FUCKING LONG. BEING TOO LONG IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO IN A POP SONG. WHY are some of these 10+ minutes??? Nothing fucking happens in them!

3. Will Toledo is not a good performer, vocally or instrumentally. He has little range or presence, and can just barely hit notes. All of the playing on here is very sloppy- and there are also random drum fills, or some guitar lick, or noodling in everywhere where there could be effective usage of silence. WHY?

4. The lyrics are maybe some of the most solipsistic and pretentious nonsense I've ever read.

This entire album is basically one big instruction guide of what not to do when making pop music. Don't be lazy with voice leading, learn about harmonic and scale degree functions, learn how to be on time (everything here is so fucking sloppy! USE A METRONOME WHEN PRACTICING, BILL TOLEDO), if you REALLY are insistent on lyrics then go read actual poetry, learn how to actually arrange or orchestrate.

The most baffling part of this to me is that it's a re-recording. This guy has been involved in music for WAY longer than I have, and he's made this? This is what he has to show? Not only that, but this is what he has to show when he goes back and remakes an old piece of work? Look, I already told you I have way too much to say on this- I've already said too much as it is... blech. Worthless.

Slint - Spiderland (5/10)

A bit underwhelming. I think I have some bias against "texture"; based music but it's not like this is outright BAD, just kind of meandering, and not melodic/harmonically interesting at all which I don't enjoy. I kind of like how jazzy it is, lots of sixths and sevenths here- but it's too REPETITIVE. Very structured. Each section just kind of cycles between a few arpeggios, some minor key melody, and it all kind of lead to the tonic in a predictable way. The dynamics are very basic too- and it kind of gets agonizing in "For Dinner" 'cuz it's trying very hard to build tension but none of the chords and melodies really warrant that, so it kind of goes nowhere. I also actually don't hear much interesting dissonance being played with either, not really many chromatic chords or notes (more like very large leaps in intervals), it's all pretty minor-key consonant sounding to me. Any chromaticism is usually repeated in the riffs or its in passing. Also, there's not much variation in phrasing, I guess the accenting changes sometimes, but that's about it- and it's not very substantial either- especially because of all of the tremolo. JEEZUS, the tremolo. I don't get what's so special about playing the same note a bunch of times, it's not building any tension or anything.

I think the most disappointing part of this is the vocals. You could've easily had much more melodic interplay here if the vocals were used that way- like Ved Buens Ende or Shudder to Think, they use pretty similar chords (tho the latter has way better voice leading) and melodic ideas but with melodies and harmonizations to play against them. But here it's kind of just... talking, which fits aesthetically but isn't terribly interesting to listen to.

IDK, I just don't hear what everyone else is evidently hearing with this. This also isn't my first time listening to this- I used to like it a ton, it's just that it has wavered a lot upon a variety of new musical experiences and relistens.

Miles Davis - Kind of Blue (5/10)

Fine, but nothing exceptional. Evans is the best part of this and most of my enjoyment of the music here is from his performances, like the ending of the third piece, but besides that it's a bit middling. Far too hampered by its structure, not much harmonic tension or interesting melodies/counterpoint (which is strange for music thats supposed to be modal), there is non-functional or chromatic implications here but they don't get resolved or played with in many interesting ways. Very basic jazz arrangements, call-and-response interplay between the instruments, da-da-da-da. It never really goes beyond the "head" sections at the beginning and that's a big problem considering these are 5+ minute pieces.

Aphex Twin - Selected Ambient Works 85-92 (4/10)

Very, very boring. Perhaps the biggest problem with all of these pieces is that they're far too long- there is very little reason for music lacking any formal development or variation to be 5 minutes. There is very little actual arrangement, really- it's the same cell of music repeated over and over again. It does sort of have a mostly AB or ABA structure, but perceptible changes are minimal due to the repetitive nature of the compositions so it doesn't really matter. This would really not be a problem if it wasn't for the fact that Aphex Twin is a poor composer; he doesn't move anything around. Everything feels static, and sluggish, motion is made inert. Melodies are boringly phrased, in terms of intervals, you have small movements of melody (usually thirds and seconds, sometimes fourths or fifths). The melodies also don't really interact with the chording in the background or with the rhythms in any interesting way- very little counterpoint. It's not like I expect this guy to be Beethoven or something, but some actual interaction with the "lines" of the music would be nice... I guess that one part in "Schottkey 7th Key Path" where it had a 2/4 against 8/8 rhythm was kind of nice.

For an album of dance music- and yes, cease your pedantry 'cause this is closer to Juan Atkins than Tangerine Dream, there is very little actual rhythmic work here, no beat elisions or interesting polyrhythmic/polymetric structures or syncopations or what have you. Mostly just very divided, but obviously accented and phrased rhythms.

Not as bad as it could really be, mostly because this sounds "pleasant" in a muzak sense, but with attentive listening I get very little out of this.