or give it all up

I wanna live on forever in the lives i've changed for the worse. I don't know if i believe our words can save us from the tragedy inherent in our existence. but actions speak louder than the words you don't say. i just wish actions could forgive the words i never listen to. forget the person and reduce them down to their impact, turn their memory into a mockery of life. will your words save your humanity from the eyes of historians? or will we all go down together, details washed out by flame? i've always thought that we were part of the problem. all questions rhetorical, it's all rhetoric wars. leave it all behind and come back home, let me throw my worries in the river. be a part of the hypothetical future. gravel-crushed hope falls through my fingers like dust in the air over a warzone. the ghosts of all things past turn to concrete in my throat and weigh me to the ground.