**My Hair Journey or My Hair History**

If you haven't read my updated page, you might not know that I shaved my head. I’d like to explain why I did it and why you may not see many current photos of me for the next couple of months.

I’ve had a fringe for years—I first cut it when I was 14 and never looked back. At the same time, I started dying my hair black, using some of the worst box dye available. In my junior year of high school, about two years ago, I thought, "Screw it, I want to go blonde." If you know anything about hair, you know that lifting black dye is torture; it’s hell. So, imagine trying to go platinum blonde on top of that—I was in a heap of trouble.

But my hair stylist, who has known me since I was a kid, managed to do it. And by God, I was blonde! The downside was that my hair was dead—like “don’t go near an open flame” dead. Having blonde hair requires a lot of maintenance, so after a couple of months, I thought, "Forget it, I’m going back to black

Me blonde**

." The blonde made my hair look even more lifeless, and going back to black was the final nail in the coffin.

I've always had pretty long hair; it was up to my chest before I decided to cut it. I slowly started trimming it down. This summer, while visiting my best friend in Michigan, we stopped at her uncle and aunt’s house. He offered to shave my head, and since I was seriously considering it, I agreed. My hair was in terrible shape, and I felt I needed a fresh start. So, she shaved my head. 

I’ve always attached a lot of sentimental value to my hair, so shaving it was definitely weird and something I was scared of. I was shaking while he did it—especially for emos, you understand how meaningful your fringes can be and how much they define you. It’s an easy characteristic to recognize, and letting that go was a big deal. 

Now, I’m letting my hair grow out naturally, and for once in my life, aside from trimming my fringe, I’ll just have brown hair. The reason I haven’t posted any bald pictures is that I feel insecure about it. I’m very feminine, and without my usual emo swag, I look a bit sickly and not quite like myself.

Honestly, I would recommend anyone to shave their head. Besides how easy it is to shower, I've always had super thick hair because I'm Turkish, so washing it used to take forever. Now, I can just hop in and out of the shower!