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I don't think I would like my friends if we met online. We are so different from each other and that is nice but It's hard to stay in contact when we are developing so differently.
My friends aren't people who would go on SpaceHey and learn html and css just to personalize more things.
They don't listen to the music I like, most of them have different hobbies, their style is different and they want to drastically different stuff in life than me.
Sometimes that gets me thinking... are we just friends because we went to the same school and because we were all a bit of outsiders?
At least that is the pessimistic way to approach it... you could also think about how you could make friends with anyone. Not just based on your superficial interests. We share much more than we think and these friendships are waaay more interesting.
But of course it's nice to know people that have the same interests as you. It is a different form of exchange though. Every person in my age that I can talk to about music isn't fun to be around. One person actually makes me aggressive and I am glad we don't go to the same school anymore.
It's kind of sacrificial? Either I can talk to someone about shared memory and very personal things but I can't talk about the things I am passionate about. Or I talk to someone that I share interests with but they are absolutely not gonna learn more about me.
Point is; friends are more complicated than just having the same interests(everyone already knew that...). But Also, the way you find friends on the internet is way different from real life. You first get to know a persons interest and then the way they tic. In real life your first impression is their articulation, looks, the way they tic and then you get to know about their hobbies and interests.
(except if they are wearing a band shirt/merch, then you also get to know the interests.)
Just random thought that I had over the last few days.
(Stole the layout from a_0)
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Statiscit 🍉
In the strange world of the internet we have the slightly more freedom in knowing someone before even properly interacting with them, be it through what they post online or repost on social media, their spotify stats, letterboxd logs and etc. This gives us the ability to sort of cherry pick the type of people we want to surround ourselves with online.
Real life friendships however are ofc as u said are very different in contrast. First you meet someone, bond and get to know them or whatever. How you met is something that kind of just happens sometimes and before u know it it’s usually all smooth sailing from there.
I have lots of online friends, some I would consider very close with how much we’ve shared about our lives to each other despite living across different parts of the globe. I have irl friends too but for the most part they don’t share any common interests as me, they’re nice company at school but it feels like I could never truly connect to them further than that. Flr a while I almost believed that I only talked to them for the sake of masquerading myself to be as social as the everyone else which in a way is partially true but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about them.
Idk friendships are complicated, I’m always jealous of those who have it come to them so easily but the truth is sometimes those people seem to feel the loneliest in a group of people
Mhh seems like I'm a little more lucky with my real life surroundings... You are totally right about the online cherry picking part! Spacehey is a great example for that too.
The internet is like living in a giant city with 1 Billion different bars, conventions, centers, ect.
Except you don't have to deal with people seeing your face or going outside.
I have so far found one really close friend on the internet but I am also kind of newer. It's hard when you never know who is going to ghost you next... Sadly also happens in real life.
by Mr. Mandelbrot; ; Report