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Just wanna vent womp womp
Earlier this year I was at a bar with some vaguely-acquaintances and so I was mostly on my own. A random girl came up to me and asked me my number. INSANE LUCK, I KNOW. We went on dates but she had issues (she came out like a month prior because she hated men, in hindsight i think she was just pissed at her ex. idk that she really likes women.) and eventually, after standing me up, decided to text me that she didn't think she was ready to date. No kidding...
But it was suddenly really lonely to not have someone to hang out with. I never wanted to date before, and after that mess, I mostly just wanted a friend maybe with benefits. So I downloaded HER and met a girl on there. She was SUPER into me, and I thought, yk what I'm into you too. We dated, I thought things were going well, but the morning after a day-long date she texted me and I couldn't reply. She blocked me. No explanation or anything. wth :,(
Then I met this most recent girl who was also way into me. we went on so many dates, she called me every pet name there is, but it was like she had a phobia for touching me. After some stupid fucking expensive dinner date, I asked her about it, because in texts and conversations she would lovebomb me, but then I try to hold her hand or anything and again it was like she just wanted to be friends. and last night I received a 500-word explanation about how her ex treated her really bad and she's just scared I'll be the same, but we can be friends. After me being strung along for 3 months... ok i know she probably wasn't really leading me on my heart just hurts
I guess it wouldn't suck as much, but on my HER profile I put that I was only looking for friends or casual hookups because I'm planning on moving in a year and it's hard to find someone with the same goal as that. But then I talk with girls and they seem suuuper interested and want to be committed, and I think yeah you're attractive too. Just to get rejected. Again. Why do I keep finding all the girls who aren't ready to date. Or just not date me? I still don't understand the second girl.
I don't know if I want to download HER again or something, the holidays are coming up and I work retail and I really don't need another girl making me cry. But I just feel so lonely again. I spend so much money and time planning and paying for dates, all the time driving around, and I'm just back at square one again. Is it me? Everyone always says aw you're so sweet I feel so bad... but it's just constant, back-to-back rejection it feels like 😢 I know I should probably start setting clearer boundaries. I am kinda touch-starved and I think that's making me run into these things. But I'm just feeling so shitty I don't even wanna look for friends. Just wanna get drunk or something. But I have nobody to drink with :,,(
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TechRider (Mélange)
You are not alone. Back, way back, so far back you need a time-travelling DeLorean to get there, I dated a lot and met many--and I mean MANY--people who had..."issues." Most of those I met suffered from unexplained jealousies, excessive mood swings, vacillations between red-hot physical passion and ice-cold distance, and more. All of them had at least one previous relationship that left them emotionally damaged in ways that exceeded my meager abilities to address, and I suspect you are meeting similar people. Note that it's really luck of the draw and nothing else. Just as you are having a run of unfortunate encounters now, your dating fortunes will most likely swing the other way as time progresses. Hang in there.