Internal Frustration

Growing up, not fitting the beauty standard/feeling ugly is really hard sometimes. Like I know that I'm hot, sexy, radiant, beautiful...yk all that jazz, but I still get really suprised when others recognize my attractiveness and ACTUALLY LIKE ME!? Like idk. I know I'm hot but I get so suprised when others know I'm hot too and sometimes, when my friends or past talking stages 🌚 tell me that I'm hot I sort of don't believe them...like they're just saying that too be nice or they're just legally blind. Growing up being bullied for my looks, I really had to WORK to be liked (and that meant being the funniest and having the most interesting personality) but its still so hard for me to recognize that other people see me as beautiful. These European beauty standards have got us ALL THE WAY FKD UPP.