I feel like shit

sep 29 2024

Okkkk so where to start. Lots has been happening in my life lately. Right now im kind of pissed at myself. so my gf and i work together, which i think i explained in one of my previous blogs. Well, recently she applied for a position thats not quite a management position, but is one step above the regular workers, and ive been kind of jealous of her. Maybe less of her but more jealous of some of my other coworkers who also got it. I feel more deserving of it than them (not of my gf), which is a pride issue. But ive projected my jealousy onto her and she feels im not happy for her, cuz of my little comments i drop sometimes. I am so happy for her and I just feel like shit for coming off that way. Maybe i rly am the toxic bf idk i feel like it sometimes. I feel like my mom rn and i hate ms for it. Ughh i do deserve this tho. Bye... :/