STORYTIME! My luck was not gold, but something else was

So, the other day, I had to take a piss, I made a mad dash towards the restroom, relieved myself, then realized there was no toilet paper left, I didn't have my phone, and I was home alone.

So I had to get up, take my pants off, and make a mad dash towards the master bathroom, which did have a spare roll, but while I was making my way there, piss drippled onto my pants which were on the floor, so after wiping and flushing, I realized ah shit, put my pants in the laundry basket, put on my pajama pants, then realized I didn't wash my hands

would've made this a bulletin, but eh