sep, 28th 2024

im going CRAZY this guy and me that I have talked to for about hmm maybe 3 months? at 2 months we started flirting and uhh idk we are kinda like a friends that flirt? I asked what we were and we both said "idk" no labels. I forgot to mention he is European and we me online. I really adore this guy and we talked like every day except the last 3 weeks he has stopped messaging me a lot and stopped being affectionate :( I miss him. today is Saturday and he hasn't messaged me back since Wednesday!! I'm going insane I'm scared he is going to ghost me or something. these last weeks he hasn't been home though.. he has been stuck at a family members house, he went over there because his grandpa died and they had a funeral. last we spoke he said he was buying a ticket to the train station so he could go home. hopefully I'm just overthinking and he will message me back.. though I sent a long paragraph about how I feel like he has been distant and I just wanna know how he feels about me. he is the nicest guy I have ever met this feels weird because I did not think he would be the type of person to just abandone someone. I'm delusional so ofc I went to TikTok and searched those Lovecraft spells LMAO. hope I get a response, my heart already hurts too much.. I don't want to feel this way anymore. its 1:39 so that means its 11:39 in his country, he usually gets up around 11 or 12 I have to go to work later, I almost broke down the other day because of this omw to work. I just hope I can get through the day if he doesn't message me. I always feel like I'm not important to anyone anymore I don't want to be abandoned anymore. goodnight :l