26. September

I just downloaded spacehey. It seems like a nice app and I hope I can write or more like make a little diary blog here. Public, because I may find someone like me, right? Maybe I should make an Introduction post or smt for myself or I just update my whole page tomorrow, because I used a layout not made by myself and I just feel uncomfortable because it's not mine and I just need this personal touch on everything (lol). I think when I keep blogging someone might actually read this so hi to that person, or even my older self ^^. 

I think I'll make like some basic "daily diary" topics to write about here such as:

What time is it rn, where are you and how are you rn

Main Emotion

Main Activity 

The best thing that happened

The worst thing that happened

Someone to write about 

Song of the day (or what you're listening to rn)

(A special introduction of anything in my life)

(Random stuff)

(Why I didn't post yesterday/in a week)

I'll come up with more I guess but I think it will also depend on the day how much I'll write. I won't promise to post daily :]

Here the daily "report" (sounds weird but I can't find other words)

It's 9:07 pm rn (21:07 Uhr for me to personally understand myself better 🙃), my main emotion was being bored, the main activity the internship at my father's "Technical Help Center" (it's not, he just uses this to get stuff for experiments cheaper), the best thing that happened was watching YouTube with my little brother and the worst thing being screamed at by my mother.

I want to write about my elementary school best friend, A. She's still in touch with me but we don't really talk expect for sending each other Reels on Instagram. I'm totally fine with it but I'm feeling bad sometimes when I'm ignoring her because I want to do smt else. I mean when I write her smt she's directly online and stuff but even when she calls me sometimes I ignore her because I'm just not in the mood or whatever. I'm just not good at talking sometimes and when I write myself "out" like rn I'm not even thinking about what I'm writing. Whatever comes into my mind is here. That's why many people think I'm weird I fear. I mean I'm not sure if they're even wasting some brain capacity on me but if they would, they would think like this in my opinion. To come back to A, she's the sweetest girl I met in the whole 14 and three quarter years of my life. She also has parents like me, but she's handling that differently and tries to mainly get better than them I guess. I can't really analyze her because I fear she's the only one who's really telling everything and anything about herself and her world to me. That's what makes her also so incredibly nice to me. The more I know about someone, the less I kinda think about them and when they need me I'm not scared to help them. Well that's natural anyway, but some extra words look like I'm really working rn ^^ (I'm not.)

I'm listening to Blue Monday by New Order right now and I think it also describes my day very well, so it's also the song of the day (yay).

When you read this and really read my whole entry, please just don't make fun of me, I'm just human and want to make it natural to share random thoughts to people you like (okay maybe I don't like you, but see this as an opportunity to think about it). Have a nice day and read many books, bye l