𓆩♡𓆪 Sep 26 2024 --❦--❀

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I literally posted a blog yesterday but ig it didn't save ;-; 

anyway i'm 19 almost 20 and i'm saur scared to be a grown up...I hate that shit so much I wish I could be a teenager forever. But also once I'm 21 I can buy my own cigs and vodka so yay! <3

my friend of 7 years isn't talking to me rn and im sauurr sad abt it... I didn't even mean to cheat on his best friend...I thought we had a different kind of relationship ughhh.(╥_╥)

im gonna get drunk again tonight and cut, im starting to get deeper and deeper so I think the more I do it the better ill get at controlling how deep I wanna go (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑

I've been thinking about relapsing with my eating disorder (anorexia) but idkkkk cuz my heart already has a murmur so i'm nervy also I already have a bad protein deficiency. oh also im so excited for halloween too!! its almost October! idk what im gonna be for halloween tho ughh maybe ill be a kitty...a slutty kitty maybe (❁ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)◞

anyway idk if I should post this publicly or not im still figuring out how this whole shit works, I wanted to start posting here cuz I wanna start journaling and I've always been bad at doing it on paper, also im mid relapse so I wanna document it this time. I've never done that before and I think talking about it will help. for context I abuse substances (anything I can get my hands on...IE no preferred drug tbh) and I have Bipolar 1, Borderline personality disorder, depresion, anxiety, and C-PTSD along with other shit but that's the main stuff

 so I'm trying not to go too crazy. ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

also I gotta work on my fursuit but I lost my scissors! my fursuit is a cat and his name is George O'Malley (he's a kinsona of George from greys anatomy cuz autism) 

I love that gay boy George, literally when I was in the psych ward I was writing a greys fan fiction with markers cuz we couldn't have pens or pencils and it of course was George, 

Right now I mainly ship George with Richard (the chief) cuz I loveee their dynamic sm like the intern (bottom of food chain) dating the chief (top of food chain) idkkkk saurr cute to me! nobody else ship them tho so I gotta make my own fucking faggy content ugh.

might post another blog later, the day just started so things might change, but I washed my face and did my hair and stuff so I feel good, even though I haven't showered in probably a week...if you get it you get it. anyway might post some poems here idk also I be saying idk a lot but its very true. 

anyway, 

-Jenny ｡:ﾟ૮ ˶ˆ ﻌ ˆ˶ ა ﾟ:｡

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