Is it Esoteric to Feel This Way?

sorry if this is lowkey a vent :>

I feel as if every single person around me hates me. My family, friends, acquaintances, stangers you name it and ill make up some reason why they hate me. It feels like i'm in a little fish tank and no matter how much i beg them to stop, everyone taps the glass. Does this feeling go away? I just feel like in trapped in a vicious cycle of 'why does everyone hate me so much?'. This feeling is slowly ruining my life. Ive begun to ignore most people, I leave myself out of things to "respect that no one wants me to go anyways", and most times when i actually go, i end up having a bad time constantly wondering if me tagging along makes me a burden. 

On the other hand, there are so many instances where i am treated harshly by the people who claim they care. Im left out all the time, i'm always the last choice and nothing regarding me or my feelings are taken into consideration. I'm the oldest of the siblings in my family so perhaps that contributes? I feel like all the hard work i do for myself is looked down on by my family and i cant tell if its stemmed from jealousy or just plain hate. Its all a jumble really. I hope that one day i can find people who truly appreciate me for me because i feel like i'm being taken for granted.

Does anyone else feel this way? if yah then share your experience! I'd also love to know if it seems like i'm making up this hatred, maybe as some sort of self sabotage or if it seems like i'm generally just surrounded by assholes. If anyone has any questions id love to answer!!