missing people

As in, missing PEOPLE. Not that people are missing!!!

This has been on my mind for a while. I had a friend for a few months who I met online. He was really cool, and we got along well. I was going through a lot of things at the time that had me more stressed than usual, and our conversations slowed down, I think because of me. Then we stopped talking altogether. I think about him often. I wonder how he is. I feel guilty sometimes, because it's my fault we drifted apart. I never communicated. He really was cool. Sometimes I imagine reaching back out to him, but I don't know what I'd be greeted with. Probably anger, or complete disinterest. Can you relate, person who may be reading this? 

I don't want to let anything like that happen again. 

Not much else to add..... I'm going to finish some schoolwork and then go to bed... (But first, I want to try beating nergigante one more time. I'm playing monster hunter stories 2. The writing and characters are lackluster, I think mostly because of poor localization/translation, and the English voice dubbing is even worse in a way that is tragically NOT charming... but I can't resist a game where you get to have a pet dragon. If anyone has this game on switch, we should play together ^>^)

EDIT: I just remembered. A few months back he did make a tumblr and reach out to me. I was uncomfortable because I wasn't sure how he felt about me. And I had no idea how to talk to him. I should have said something, or at least tried harder but I didn't. It was a very dry interaction. Then he messaged me something ominous, 'do you a' (which I think could be the start of, do you actually *insert something here*) and then deactivated his Tumblr after a few days. Yipe... 

I don't know if either of us are the same people anymore at this point either. Our relationship declined overtime because I wasn't honest, with him or myself. It was awfullllll. I'm not going to try and protect my pride by saying I was blameless. It was all on me. Acknowledging that that doesn't mean anything if I don't try to go back and amend things. But I feel like I'd be going back to a house that's long burnt down with a glass of water in my hand.. Would it even do much good? Maybe it's the thought that counts the most. Like, you wanted to try and help the house either way, even if it was too late for it to matter. The house being our relationship, not him. I don't want anyone to get it confused.

 I don't want to go into many further details about this, but if anyone is particularly invested I'm open for a PM.