grandma's death

My grandmother, 81 years old, passed away yesterday morning after having been on hospice since last Wednesday. This morning on my phone I actually had a huge blogged typed out. I don't know if I'll still post it. My mood has completely changed.

I had my first exam in my CNA community college class. I made an 87%. I don't have any study skills. My brain is awful and I have no idea why. This is why I'm thinking about letting go of that CNA and RN dream for now. My communication skills are horrible. I can't come up with words for anything. It's a surprise I'm even typing this out now. I'm a fast typer, but I have a slow brain.

My brain hurts so much. I'm just genuinely a stupid person who doesn't learn. I have this limited vocabulary I suppose, that's why I can't choose my words. have zero guidance. I'm scared about my future. I don't understand anything. I can't keep up a conversation. I'm making it all about myself again.

Her funeral is this weekend.