Summer recap 2024

So, things I did this summer. I was single for the first time in two years so yeah I flirted here and there, I felt extremely connected to my creativity this summer with a new found interest in photography and process in my guitar playing. The most important thing I did this summer though was probably my short film "Génesis" in my native tongue, spanish. The story is pretty cliché and the dialogue kind of sucks do to the time limit but I learned a lot while writing and directing this short film (i guess the photography is sort of great though). My personal life was kind of everywhere and that inspired a LOT of new songs of mine. 

From early June to mid August I fell for one of my best friends, she is also my ex but I didn't mind all that much, she just touched my heart but she had a bf at the time and I think I was just so caught up in the fact that she deserved better that my feelings got confused from being platonic to sort of not. I think it was a mix of loving her, finding her attractive and the allure that unreachability gave her. It made me think the world of her but in retrospect we would've clashed in many things and I really don't think we would've lasted more than 2 months.

Then the 25 year old russian boy came along, an interesting person that I got the pleasure of getting to know through instagram and real life and although we never actually slept together (just a makeout sesh and a lot of sexual tension), I really appreciate him since I learned a lot from him of what I want my life to look like and what i wanted my romantic life to look like also (it basically didn't work out because i am 17 and he felt uncomfortable with the age gap sooo i made a song about it lol). But I got to hand it to him, he really was right, he said to me "I'm absolutely sure that you'll be able to find a nice guy in your age who'll be a way better match than me. You have all the qualities for that - smart, kind, pretty and fun to be around - so don't worry" and he was right. I did. 

Andy is his name. "I like your style" he said, "me yours" I replied. After that it was just an understanding, although we did talk all day and night, but an understanding that we were made for each other, that after those first texts, there would'nt be another day that passes without a reply. It's really special to be able to love someone but to also feel understood and seen for the first time is another thing entirely. Our first date was as magical as our connection; going through the streets of the city, kissing under the rain, entering into different churches and observing it's art but also knowing we could never be welcomed there. Then one day it came to me, a memory of a person I made eye contact with, such a silly thing really but it changed my heart so long ago, in April. I still knew so many details about that day, when I had just broken up with my ex the week before and that man looked, God I just heard Artic Monkeys in my head but I kept walking until I turned around to see he had already left on a bus, number 35. I told Andy about this and of course, as I predicted, it was him. He told me he had written about the encounter our eyes had, there was nothing more to say. I was surprising but also not as much as you would expect. Of course that would happen with us, how couldn't it when we had so much people in common but never met, when we attract the other by our similarities and need the other for their differences. 

And then... He cheated on me soooo, yeah :)