stream of conciousness/life stuff

god i fucking HATE learning my lines ugh. im dr. seward in my schools upcoming performance of dracula and the only reason i got the role is because i have a good memory and he has the most lines so. yeah im struggling with digesting actual pages upon pages of difficult dialogue. i cant stop listening to sad music now that theres a chill in the air, fall and winter are always so nostalgic in a weird way. the way the air smells reminds me of the mornings i spent outside smoking during junior high.

i have so much homework???? i thought senior year would be my fun slacker year where id just smoke weed in the theatre room, sober up for auditions, go home and blog with 30min of homework max. idk im an idealist. i also havent been high in like two weeks and its getting annoying. also my vape died. first world problems blah blah blah i know but sometimes a guy just needs to smoke and play roblox for four hours okay??? should be getting some this week hashtag yay! i rlly should quit nicotine but everyone in my life vapes/smokes cigs rn so thats a 20's problem for me to tackle. 

i need to write more ugh. i just learned the reason why my ex broke up with me ( he was using me as a fun high school fling with no intentions of moving forward ) so!!! that should be perfect inspiration!!! but alas writers block beats a heavy drum. idk is a five minute audio clip of me crying poetry?? a lazy, sad man's poetry? someone tell shakespeare he has some competition

id say goodnight if i wasnt going to stay up for another hour and a half probs <33