Minecraft Movie (Rant & Review (recent updates after watching the movie))

Yes it is called "a Minecraft Movie" why a and not THE??

I know it's just a teaser trailer, but it looks soo bad.

I was worried from the very beginning when it was announced as live action, and even more worried when they said Jack Black was in it (he is literally just some old guy who is supposed to be "funny" or something??).

This should have been complitely animated. I've seen better 3D minecraft fan made Minecraft musicvideos on youtube back in the 2010s.

The characters outfit design is horrendous and looks cheap, "Steve" is just Jack Black in a blue shirt. He doesn't even look like Steve at all!! And who even are these people? Where is Alex?

The story is so lame and has been done a billion times or something!! They should have watched/played the Minecraft Storymode movie/game and taken some notes.

More on the graphics. The animals look so bad, they are disgusting! everytime I see that stupid pink sheep I want to puke everywhere!!

Why are the Piglings and Ghasts in the overworld?! Just use the classic mobs like zombies, skeletons and endermans. And you could make them battle wither or the ender dragon.

This movie is gonna be ASS, and I am dissapointed in everything and everyone who made this happen and who support this. There is no hope.

I feel even more terrible about my dad and littlebrother thinkng that this shit is gas. Like what?! Are you fucking blind?! It looks like a cheap skit! A skit that isn't even funny!!

Idk, you probably don't even care.

I just know that I wont be seeing this movie and I don't want it in my home. It's so ugly.

I hope this is a joke, like the first Sonic movie trailer. But it probably isn't and that worries me.

I will edit this later when we know and see more about this movie. (if I remember...)

I just hope there isn't gonna be more of this shit...

End.

Update:

I have seen the "upgraded" trailer, but to me it looks like the exact same.

I still think it looks bad and would've been better animated and without the "live action" vibe to it.

My friends really want to see it and so does my brother and dad, I just can't wrap my head around the reason why. My friends want me to see it with them as well, but to me it just looks so ugly.

I will be seeing it though, because I was asked to. But I don't think seeing it will change my mind.

That's that for now.

Even more on this update:

This movie isn't even out yet and I have already someone put a Jack Black minecraft figure in a jar, so people are meming this movie hard.

In the trailer the pandas looked ok, but I still hate the humans.

Why Jack Black?

Why the cheap ass clothes?

Why humans in general?

Where sharp edges and proper blocks?

Why and where?

It's so basic with the story as well!! Evil guy hates all fun and whimsy, hero's defeat him by the power of friendship.

That plotline is so used, the only media liked it in was in My Little Pony Friendsip Is Magic, anywhere else it's so overused and lame.

I seriously doubt if I'll even go see this ipad baby ass movie.

I would even argue that this has to be one even worse than Hot Frosty and Pixels, I've seen both and they made me laugh, unlike this "minecraft" movie, it just seems so stereotypical.

I'll watch the movie youtubers reactions on the movie though, because I can't judge something if I have just seen the trailer, I mean I can, but still I like youtube movie commenteries.

REVIEW HERE!!

4.4.25.

I saw the movie.

I took my judgy ass into that cinema and had a great time. Ofcourse I had fun because I was with my sister and friends, but the movie was actually not that bad.

Maybe I had made it to be something it was not in my head and was waiting for it to be shit, but I was rather pleasently surprised.

Ofcourse there were some things I did not like. The beginning of the movie was just explaining, telling not showing. The characters wardrobes were also not that great, not terrible, but not great. It was pretty cut and dry with the story: Good VS Evil, creativity good and evil hate all creativity because of reason X. I also didn't like how it was unrealistic compared to the game, like a big bad pigling, some big fast iron golem, how they built stuff and how there were skeletons on spiders everywhere. But that's just nitpicking. Idk how the one woman knew that the boy blew up factory's mascot or how to track his phone, but oh well. I somehow really liked the garbage guy, and Steve actually wasn't that bad either. And I was really waiting for Jennifer Coolidge because I had seen her in the trailer. Speaking of the trailer, the ugly ahh sheep was there, the pink sheep. And there was multiple there, even though pink sheeps are rare in minecraft, I've only seen one (but ofc I don't play that much minecraft, so who am I to judge this movie). I'm not gonna say anything on the Technoblade "cameo" tribute, I never watched his videos, sad he passed away and it's cool to be honored by being put into a movie about your passion and job I guess. Okay, I also was surprised to see how there wasn't any of those "he's right behind me isn't he?" or "guys, you're gonna wanna see this." moments, although there was some other cringey stuff like unfitting battle music at times, or Jack Black singing. Idk, the singing was fun, I just got scared that I had been jumped by a surprise musical. One of my favourite things was one of the pigling generals, me and my sister started laughing wen the though looking guy just suddenly started speaking with a gayish accent, Idk what to call it. Too bad he died. Some of the jokes were pretty funny, I can't really remember many of them off the top of my dome and I didn't write anything down, most funny moments were by Garret and Steve. Okay I gotta say, one of the other unrealistic things was that killing endermen was hard or something. Steve has lived there who knows how long, build a theme park but only had one enderpearl? Come on, they aren't that hard to get. Also Idk what the enderman did, it made the kid like hallucinate but he was like totally fine after it and just hit the enderman who like just didn't do anything to get away, other than telepost back a few steps. Idk what to say, I don't want to make this too long. I didn't see if there was an end credit scene, other than Jennifer dating a well spoken villager. 

Pretty fun movie actually, I should learn to be patient and judge less harshly as well as not to make any preconceptions. I am bad at rating, but I'll give it like a 3.5 or 4 out of 5. Idk, go see it I guess, if you haven't seen it yet.

6.4.25.

Okay so there was an end credit scene. My lowkey moviebro dad went to watch it with my little brother and stayed to see the scene. I am kind of bummed that he didn't have much to syai about the movie, or say how fun it was even though he had been praizing it. Anyway, the end credit scene apparantly had Alex, and I so wish that if they made a second movie that Alex wouldn't become Steve's love interest, that would be so, Idk, ehh. A bit more about the movie, I really liked the small pigs that were with the evil witch piglin, the ones that had the swinging mist things. They were cute. Okay, now I didn't mention this on the earlier review because I wasn't sure if my brain was just infested or what, but after seeing tik toks about the movie and people speaking about it, I realized that I wasn't the only one who thought they felt a lowkey highkey homo/bromance vibe between Steve and Garret. That sounds funny, because it is. But seriously, when I was watching the movie I laughed at their dynamic as I was thinking "Wait, this shit is kinda gay." And now my tik tok has shitty ships edits of them, I love it, I love the internet, I wasn't the only one and I've found my people I guess. Fun movie, would watch again.