Love?

Another silent and dark night for me. All alone with my music. I finally fell in love with someone, but something is pulling at my heart.

Ever since I was a teenager, I dreamed of finding true love, not just a fleeting feeling that most people my age wanted. I wanted to date to marry. to have someone hold me forever and comfort me. But one by one, they always end on a sour note. Ghosted, Cheated on, Death, Used, Abused, etc. Its gotten so bad that I'm used to being a trophy girlfriend for only a month or so. 

All the tears, the days of heartbreak, every clench of my heart has taken it's toll on me. Now anything I see on TV or read that has to do with heartbreak, I suddenly feel it even though it's not happening to me. For example if I see a scene where someone is caught cheating, my heart drops and tears sting my eyes because I know it all too well.

 I have this painful feeling of wanting to cry out of nowhere, but I need to suck it up until I'm alone. But now somebody wants me. They said that they want to be with me forever. but I'm scared. I'm scared to show them the real me. The real Midnight. Maybe this time, I'll be kept.