i want to grow roots deep af in his life <3

for a while now i've been wanting to do tiny embroideries on my bf's clothes, we already have embroidery blacelets i've made for the both of us, they look cute and are i want to do more of this like making a small skull on the back pocket of his pants, or mend the holes in his shirt so whenever he picks the clothes up and looks at it he will think of me. 

he already thinks of me often though, we have a great relationship and i love him very much. but as much as i hate to think about this, we might break up someday, and if that happens i want there to be reminders of my existence in his everything, pictures and drawings of us in his wallet, dead flowers i have him months ago and tiny embroidery & mends in all of his clothes.

i would feel kind of guilty probably, it makes me sad to see that i think of shit like this but i know myself and unfortunately, how much i like hurting others i love. and although he would never forget me in any way im terrified of being forgotten, so much i would rather scar him.