tw sh depression and diary type but ı m so lonenly so ı post public

ı wake up and ı feel like a corpse, so empty, talentless, uselees, unlikeable, weird why ı always wake up like this? why me? why here? ı hate myself but ı m good to others ı m kind person why ı feel like ı make something wrong? ı m struggle with myself. antidepressants re useless cut myself feels better. now ı feel like a attention seeker ı m sorry but ı m not Okay thx for reading