Dream Journal | Day 1

Before I start, there's something I want to explain since it'll be a recurring topic in my dream journaling, and that is "Who is Balthazar?"

The answer is: I don't know. Ever since I was 13, I've been dreaming almost daily with this mysterious man, though back then he was just a boy, half a year younger than me. It all started with a dream where I was being chased by evil men down a well-lit yet empty street in the middle of an equally empty metropolitan city, which made it quite eerie, to say the least. Such a place should've been bustling with people everywhere yet it wasn't, and in turn, there was no one there to help me. I ran for what felt like hours, my legs already wearing out, the men almost catching up to me, and that they did, but at the very same moment a car drifted out of nowhere parking right beside me. The door opened and without thinking I immediately jumped inside, closing it as quickly as I could, trying to regain my composure so I could thank my mystery savior. I looked to my right and there he was, a boy my age wearing a black turtleneck sweater, smiling sweetly at me. He had brown eyes and dirty blonde hair, and didn't really say much throughout the drive, but it didn't matter because I knew I was going to be safe as long as I was by his side.

That was merely the beginning. For some reason, this person my mind created hasn't left my side at all in these 16 years, and I have no idea why. Sure, you're probably thinking "maybe you were lonely" but back then I wasn't, quite the contrary, those years were some of my best ones when it came to socializing, I was such an extroverted butterfly; loved talking to absolutely everyone, hanging out, going to and hosting pajama parties, traveling with my friends, doing all sorts of outings, attending every birthday party and quinceañera I could, I was never alone and never had a single dull moment. So then why did this person appear? Why didn't he ever leave?

As I mentioned before, Balthazar has been "growing" by my side for all these years, he's now a man who keeps visiting me in my sleep, and at this point I consider him a dear friend who I look forward to meeting every night. I don't know nor understand the meaning of all this, if there even is one, but given that most of the dreams I'll be sharing will most likely feature him in one way or another, I thought it'd be better to give this explanation so I can freely call him "Baltha" instead of going "a guy" or any other ambiguous noun.

That being said, last night's dream was...

It was a very dark night, and -though few in presence- the clouds were thick enough to block any moonlight that might've reached us. Balthazar and I were among a group of strangers, supposedly we were all part of the same team tasked with finding some criminals, and luckily for us they made their appearance quite fast. We were standing over what seemed to be ancient ruins, broken pillars and stairs all around us, and in the middle of it all ran a very narrow yet fast stream. The criminals conjured a rafting boat out of nowhere and made their escape downstream, our only option being to run as fast as we could along the bank, hoping to catch them wherever it may end. This chase continued for so long that most members of the team had already given up, but I didn't want to, I simply couldn't. Despite my burning legs I kept running and running, determined to not lose sight of them, and it was then when I saw it, standing ominously in the distance: a huge gate with narrow space between each of its bars was waiting at the very end of this rapid stream, the criminals realized this too but had no way of stopping, their panic becoming visible and attempts to jump off being futile, for they were going extremely fast. It seemed to happen in a blink, their bodies completely crushed against the bars, what were once humans was now just some fine, red paste, the boat shredded to pieces, no remain whatsoever of the vehicle or persons that rode it. All the others arrived, asking me where the criminals had gone, but all I could do was stare with disgust at the red remains, it was all the explanation they needed. Having had enough of this sight, I eventually turned around wanting to move away from the crimson waters, and in doing so I noticed we were surrounded by even more ruins, though these ones looked a bit more modern. Buildings? City buildings? Why and how would such a big, modern building be collapsed like this? Baltha followed me and with nimble steps jumped on top the biggest concrete block, giving me a helping hand in order to go up as well. It was such a huge piece that you could easily overlook one of the city's main highways, a seemingly endless stream of cars buzzing and dashing with their lights zooming past like fireworks, it was quite a beautiful sight. Until I looked to my right. Tall, huge, enormous, as if mocking us, a gigantic rock was encrusted on the ground, it was so big that even though it was kilometers away from us it still towered above us, and in the middle of such an insulting slab of rock a timer kept ticking down. It wasn't days, or hours, it was minutes. We had 12 minutes left, but for what? What is this thing? Was this was completely knocked over this and other buildings? Where did it come from? Is this some alien bomb? Man-made? No, really, what the hell is this and why is nobody reacting to it at all? Don't all the people driving down the highway see this? What's gonna happen when its timer reaches zero? In a desperate attempt, I asked Baltha to lift me up so I could climb over some fence in order to get a better view of the highway, and once I was on top of it I tried my best to signal to all the oncoming cars about this ominous structure, but no one cared. 
8, 7, 6...
Time kept going down, the rest of the team members were still much to preoccupied with the tomate paste that formerly possessed a human shape, we didn't know what to do or who to tell, in the middle of all that darkness the only other light in contrast with those of the cars were the giant numbers going down, and down, and down.
3, 2, 1...
Seconds left, there wasn't much else to do. Baltha and I simply hugged each other, burying my face on his chest, not wanting to witness whatever it was that was going to happen. It was a warm and calming hug, for a moment I even forgot what I was so scared of... until it all went black. A pitch dark black, deep, endless, silent. I was nowhere. I was no one. Have I died? Is this it? Even though I felt I was "thinking", I wasn't really. No words were actually forming in my mind, or anywhere at all for that matter. I didn't exist, at least not like I had up until then. I started growing really tired, I felt as if my mind, my thoughts, were starting to fade. I could barely string words together, everything was so dark, no sound, no sight, no nothing. It wasn't long now, my time was almost up, everything I ever was, my entire being, was disappearing, lost forever to the infinite darkness, where there was nothing, I was nothing, nothing... nothing... nothing...

And then I woke up ⭐😋