ok first entry dont mind the fact ive had an account since november of last year or whatever

          I'm like legitimately so fucking lonely right now. I moved in June because my mom died, so now I have to live with my dad again, which is fine, but now I have nobody to talk to except online friends. Neither of my class groupchats (I have two because two different schools) talk much, and I dont know anyone here cause i never  leave my house except for dinner or something at a restaurant. dont get me wrong i love being online and sitting in bed all day, but it gets tiring when its all u do everyday for like 2 months straight. ik its kinda my fault i have no friends yet but im still not happy about it. 

          ive only got like a month left till school starts again atleast, and im going on a cruise tomorrow which will be fun. but tbh i just wanna have like normal regular days of hanging out with friends and going places and talking for hours. like i feel like i havent had that yet. i havent done anything noteworthy all summer and all the summers before, while still fun, were with my mom not my friends. i probably should start writing in a diary now that i think about it. i dont really talk to anyone about stuff like this so it might be good to atleast write it down. im kinda nervous to do that tho cause whenever ive tried in the past ive just kinda given up after like 2 days.

          ig i could just do an entry when i feel like it and not everyday but then it seems kinda pointless. anyways tho, uhh yea im pretty excited for school to start cause of the whole no friends thing. itll also be nice too meet other queer kids. i want to join the gsa but idk if i can cause my dads pretty homophobic. ill try to join it tho or atleast involve myself in any queer happenings around school ig. idk. 

          but yay first year of highschool. should be fun. im just mostly glad cause i get to stop wearing uniforms. those things were the worst. so uncomfortable and stuffy, but somhow i was still freezing. tbh i dont plan on wearing anything crazy or super fashionable but itll be nice to dress like a normal person for school. plus i just felt ugly in the uniform. i didnt like they way anything fit or felt, and it made me feel like all of my proportions were off and i looked weird. i already have enough insecurities as it is i dont need to wear things that make it worse.

          anyways. thats kinda it i think. thanks for whoever reads the whole thing. i just had a lot to say and i needed to say it igg. have a good night or day or whatever time it is for u when u read this. actually one last thing. i wont be online at all for the next week or so so if u guys do actually read this or comment anything itll take me a bit to respond. the blog might be gone by then tho. wait thats bullitens. also shush ik i gave up on fixing the typos and stuff im tired its like 11 30 at night. bye