Thinking about getting a body pillow

Just days after my friend, who is still in high school, had left their last relationship, they've vowed not to enter another for at least two weeks. It seemed like a challenge to even find someone within that time, but within two days, they've already begun chatting with someone... I know I shouldn't be jealous since their last relationship wasn't the best, and this person doesn't seem to be too good either, but hearing them loudly proclaim "I don't want to waste my teenage years! I want to experience teenage love!" to someone in their 20's who's never been in love seriously hurts... It was a dream of mine too 😭 I am genuinely happy for them, and try to offer advice and support when I can, but I feel bad for feeling annoyed whenever the topic comes up :( 


Today I thought a bit deeper about this predicament and have decided 'Why not save up for a body pillow?' If it's about being a part of each other's lives, then even if they aren't conscious, I think it would make me feel as if they were as much as part of my life as I am in theirs. To have someone I find interesting and care for that I can share the details of my day and life with, that I can notice new tiny details of everyday (even if it is through a separate world), that I can look forward to coming home to after work would answer a lot of doubts I've been having about my life recently.


I think for a while, at least, I'll still feel sad over all the memories I don't have. But I think I really just need to come to terms that it's not worth anything to cry over things that literally don't exist... 🤦