Define Trust

These long pauses without talking kill me. 

When I send messages and you leave me on delivered. 

The wheels in my mind begin to turn. Why is it that I'm constantly left on delivered when your phone never leaves your hand. You never want to snap me back. At one point we were besties, now I don't even make your list. 

Yesterday you asked me if it was okay if you and T (the ex) remain friends. Today I asked you if she knows that they are "just friends" or if she still thinks she's your girlfriend. You said no, she doesnt know you're just friends. She still thinks she's your girlfriend. You said you would talk to her this weekend. 

I just don't know. You're talking about having me visit a couple of nights a week. Whose there when I'm not though? You say you want monogamy and to settle down, start a family. My worst fear is that you keep the door open with T, have a kid with me, then run back to her because she refuses to have a baby with you. 

I have other objections too. We aren't talking much. I deleted all the naughty pics I sent you from snap and you didn't notice for like a month. Ergo, you're at a minimum binging on pron, though I suspect it's more than that. You used to hit me up to talk dirty. Now.... nothing.... 

When I asked you if you wanted the content, you said no. But made a comment about having a "p*rn phone". If it's not coming from me, where is it coming from? You know? 

These long pauses.... Moments left on delivered or left on read.... I would say "Theres someone else" but there's literally someone else. Multiple people by the sounds of it. 

I don't trust you anymore. 

How could I? 

And if I don't trust you, what is the point?