my first love (poem)

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he looked at me, but he didn't see what I see. I saw a false reality, a prince charming ready to save me. to make all my problems go away, thinking about him everyday. but to him I was a joke. just another girl to give him attention - love turned into apprehension, but still never a single thought to him. he made my mind, I was built by him. I loved him more than I ever loved myself. he grew flowers around my heart to the point it was suffocating, to the point it would stop beating. but my heart skipped a beat every time I looked into your eyes. I could feel a pain in my chest as I knew I was living through his lies. but he never did lie, he never really said much of anything to me. I was lying to myself all along. self sabotage like a stab to the heart. sharp as a knife, I've known you all my life. don't let this be the end. I never cared about anything but you, all I wanted was to be your girlfriend. (as if I ever had a chance.) 

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