why i locked my hair and then shaved it in less than 3 years

^{firstly, i recently learned calling them "dreads" or "dreadlocks" has negative connotations rooted in racism, so we're not calling them that anymore; they are locs}♡

but basically, because i wanted to.

when i locked my hair, i was going through a traumatic breakup from a toxic relationship. i had seriously neglected myself at that time and my hair was indicative of that; as it was so overgrown, dry, and damaged that i couldn't finger-brush it without the split ends getting caught on each other like velcro and tangling my fingers up in the mess. i knew i could either chop off all the dead hair and have short hair again like i'd always preferred _{(guess why i ever decided to grow it out)}, or i could lock it all and try something new that i'd always wanted, and have short hair later.

locking my hair started the process of me becoming grounded and connecting back to myself, my spirit, as well as the earth which we are all connected to by divine energy. after that, i explored balancing my chakras and healing from my trauma(s), which led to opening my mind to spiritualism of many forms _{(many of which seem to be damn near identical to me)}, which also inspired me to step away from society's standards and challenge my own ideas and beliefs i previously held on many things like self-expression, personal identity, and beauty standards/what is appealing and/or attractive as far as i am concerned. for once in my life, i was able to become the person i saw myself as instead of the person i was expected to be and learned to balance my feminine and masculine energies so they can flow and change as i please.

recently, as i approach my 30th birthday, i keep having this sudden nagging feeling that i have negative energies also locked into my hair, and it's time for a fresh change. i really planned to keep my hair locked for at least 5 years, but i didn't even make it to 3; and i fully plan to lock my hair again, but i will start with healthy and hair that's been well cared for♡ i'm not really sure when i will decide to let it actually start growing again because for now, i am fucking LOVING my short hair. i did initially plan to fully shave my hair, like BUZZ it, but i'm weirdly attached to my bangs and i'm not ready to lose them yet. so maybe it will get even shorter before it gets longer ;]

also, my longest loc was 26" and my hair was the longest it had been since my childhood.