another lonely rant

after short lived stability i have once again returned to my reality rock bottom of friendlessness. it is so crushing and hard to ignore so once again i will rant to my favourite void to find some sort of comfort. it is hard to go on living this endless cycle of working eating sleeping and repeating with little to no sense of companionship. i am unable to share my interests or explore to the full potential i desire. im aware all things are doable alone and sometimes certain things better to experience alone but deep down inside i really yearn for people to share my lust for life and spontaneity and even if theyre nervous - face their fears! i want someone to experience everything with me. doing everything alone and breaking all these personal boundaries and facing my own fears alone and growing up alone has just felt so empty? Despite the fact i am fulfilling things on my bucket list. I have no one to share these precious moments with, not even to speak about them with. I feel most days like the only person on earth.