I don't know how to feel about my grandma

My Grandma is deteriorating from her age and she cant accept that. She has constantly been finding reasons to make anything at all purely about her and she will do anything to get attention. the other we had a family dinner, the whole time she was acting off and she started having trouble breathing. we found out after that she overdosed on her pain meds to get attention. today she texted my mom aunt and uncle goodbye messages and told my grandpa she was going to kill herself. my mom said she does this often and even did it when my mom was my age. My mom says she doesnt want me to think of my grandma any differently now but i dont think i can ever look at her as somebody i can love again.

To anyone reading this im sorry this is so disorganized but yk