im tran gener

im tran gener

okay so like in seriousness i have been very... all over the place on my gender for the past like thirty thousand years. i've id'ed as a lot of things and as time has continued i've just.. tried not to like, die?? like i stopped caring, stopped correcting anyone, stopped insisting on anything. and eventually that turned into just "i'm just gonna be girl. i'm just gonna try and be a normal girl. and there will be no more problems."

it turns out, if you run from your problems, they can catch up with you! had a massive dysphoria episode like last week and came to the conclusion that as much as i like dressing feminine and not having #Problems i like being happy more. i like having a boyfriend and being his boyfriend. i like when people address me masculinely. i'm most comfortable when i'm dressed masculinely.

and then i dyed my hair green and ordered a binder! and a pronoun pin! and made like 3 tmasc flags into bracelets for myself! and updated all of my social media to reflect my .. decisions . yknow

so like it's not this huge revelation for me, i've known i'm not cis for a while it's just been a lot of back and forth, but i'm tired of the back and forth. i just wanna chill. more specifically i would like to chill in my binder when it shows up. that'll be nice