HELL STARTS IN SEPTEMBER (pansexual drama)

I have to go to highschool starting in september and basically all of my friends are a grade below me. so basically they're not going to be there until next year :(((( and they'll be shut away in the FrEsHmAn HaLlWaY in one corner of the school so I wont even SEE them. 

in other news I found out that my crush is straight after she showed up to the school dance with a brand new boyfriend and rubbed it in everybody's face the whole time. 

I feel so naive about her. aside from her not even being interested in me, she's kind of a jerk. like, shes literally bullied a lot of other people I know for like a year and a half. also shes a pick me girl and she's fans of classic rock like kiss and nirvana and AC DC but shes one of those fans where she gatekeeps the living fuck out of all of the music she likes and she calls you a faker or a poser if you say you like a band but don't know EVERYTHING about them. shes been kind of rude to me and really only befriended me in the first place because I was bringing her snacks every day in math class. idk. 

I had a dream and in it we were dating but then I woke up and was like "that was a great dream but too bad it'll never happen" I felt like that one weezer song. 

my best friend EGG who's in the grade below me is the sweetest most wholesome incredible kindhearted person ever and they've kept me alive all year so I'm scared to be without them next year. making new friends sucks and I am NOT looking forward to it. 

its like 10pm dude I SHOULD BE SLEEPING WHAT

if ur still reading im surprised honestly, so thanks ig. if anybody has any advice pls comment it I DESPERATELY NEED ADVICE (for highschool and the girl i like) <3 ty and keep urself alive