𝙌𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙯⋆｡°✩❤️‍🩹

Actually ngl I'm doing pretty well rn jfdkhJKFDHJK so idk why I'm making this vent blog but I also wanna ramble about some stuff in the back of my mind. T,..,T" 

Okay so quick story time 

I used to be friends with this one person a while back, who for convenience we will call N, and our friendship ended summer of last year and I have literally not talked to them since then, like at all. They basically dropped me and befriended someone who literally used to bully me and just told me they "out grew me" and dipped. I was LIVID and so I blocked them on everything and haven't contacted them since. Tell me why my baby cousin tells me people are giving her shit at school because N has been befriending 15 year olds and sending them to harass her?? Keep in mind N is 19 and started college this year?? 

Our beef is literally a year old, so I have NO IDEA where this is coming from or why she's still talking about me considering I've done literally nothing to her. N made one attempt to reach out to me in November of this year (Well kinda) they commented on my sister's post on Instagram saying they hope I am doing well, to which I ignored it. So I guess they didn't like being ignored? Anyways I'm not quite sure what to do about that. 

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On another note.. I keep having feelings about reaching out to multiple people I have given myself a no contact rule for, which I don't know why? I think it's just because I want to say something, but I definitely don't want to hear their response. I know that their response would either start something back up again or cause a negative emotional response from me and I'd most likely say some mean stuff that I didn't want to say. I also desire no need for any kind of emotional relationship with any of those people, so I honestly do not know what my brain is craving right now. I keep thinking what I'm craving is closure but honestly, I don't want that either! WHAT DO YOU WANT BRAIN?! O,..,O"

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Here's some positive stuff! I've been learning piano and I have started dorm shopping! ^,..,^ I have a huge wave of inspiration coming towards me and it makes me so happy!! I've been making so much art!