Life is Strange: Before the Storm but actually letting the characters be complex

I watched a whole bunch of essays with Mia today and have been thinking about Life is Strange and it's well-known bomb of a sequel. I'm gonna write a thing about it.

SO OBVIOUSLY MAJOR ENTIRE SPOILERS FOR LIFE IS STRANGE: BEFORE THE STORM !!!

ALSO! CONTENT WARNING FOR THE FOLLOWING (they're mostly all topics that already were a part of before the storm but just in case a refresher is needed):
- Manipulation, gaslighting, and abuse. Both in romantic relationships and from parents
- Unconsensual drugging of minors
- Severe mental health issues and it's affects on others when left untreated
- Drugs, excessive drug use, and drug dealers
- Suicidal ideation and self harming behaviour

So the sequel is often criticized for the clunky writing and terrible character choices. One of the essays we watched talks about how it seemed as if the developers were interested in exploring an interesting relationship between Chloe and Rachel involving manipulation and a power imbalance that could possibly explain the character flaws Chloe was frequently criticized for in the original game. The game didn't really do this and instead created a shallow story where they wanted to portray a romance but didn't want to actually include any of the important pieces of character that was already set up in the original title.

The final choice of the game happens after Chloe learns of Rachel's father hiring someone to kill Rachel's biological mother who had been absent for all 15 years of her life due to her drug use and Chloe arriving in time to at least help put a stop to it (she gets knocked out for her trouble but at least someone else stops the killer). When she wakes up, Rachel's Biological mother then tells her that she can't tell Rachel that her dad tried to kill her, he did it because he was trying to protect his daughter when the bio mum had showed up to see her while claiming to have finally been a year sober. He didn't believe she could keep it up and sent someone to make sure she would never have a chance to "corrupt" Rachel, even though she had respected his decision, because he knew Rachel would try to see her now that she knew of her bio mum's existence. All that awful nonsense being said, the bio mum still tells Chloe not to tell Rachel the truth as "she needs a loving family to take care of her" and, if she learnt the truth, she would obviously never go near her father again. As she's only 15, she does still need parents to take care of her.

It seems that the game is trying to compare your choice to lie to Rachel in order to keep her safe and supposedly happy to Rachel's choice to hide her relationships with Frank and Jefferson from Chloe because... well it's cheating on Chloe. That's not really a good comparison obviously, one is for the other's benefit (staying with a loving family who definitely made mistakes but did it to try protect her) while the other is for totally selfish reasons!

But what if the reasons weren't so selfish? What if we actually could make that comparison work more?

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What if we actually took Chloe's mental health a little more seriously and we let Rachel be more manipulative. After her father's death, Chloe's mum is busy trying her best to support them both as a single mum and can't help Chloe as she clearly is unable to cope with this immense grief on her own. Max is off elsewhere and Chloe spirals, alone and doing the only thing that seems to make her feel anything other than the crushing lonliness and loss that even adults really struggle with, let alone a 15 year old. She goes to the punk bars, yells embarrassingly stupid insults at people who could easily harm her if they weren't clearly trying to hide their pitty, she stands on train lines to the last second and is almost stabbed in a self harming cycle of adrenaline hunting distractions. And that's where she meets Rachel.

Rachel, who's a straight A student, popular, passionate actor who seems to be able to fit with and charm everyone. Who's the daughter of a DISTRICT ATTORNEY and has inherited her father's ability to "read" (manipulate) the truth from others. Has maybe even learnt to use it, along with an expected and later cultivated persona of the perfect girl, to keep her safe (and at an advantage, not all of her manipulation has to be explained away. Let women be selfish and wrong!!!). Rachel saves Chloe from being stabbed with a fucking glass bottle and from that very moment, Chloe is besotted.

Rachel thinks she can work with that, she's smart and Chloe is cute. Plus, hanging out with her is different, Chloe doesn't expect her to be perfect. Unlike her dad who she finds kissing some woman who isn't her mum. Her father, the one who pushed her to breaking point to be this perfect girl she has put every ounce of her energy into keeping up, the one who would expect nothing less of "the daughter of the district attorney", constantly investigating and scrutinizing her to make sure she kept up this lie above all else. And here he was, cheating on her mother who had tried so hard to take her side in the face of her father who, at the end of the day, always won out over them. After all he'd put her through, he couldn't even hold up his end of the deal? How could he? No, how fucking dare he? Rachel is so overcome with all this that she doesn't notice the fire she started has spread to an uncontainable inferno.

But Chloe is there. Brutally imperfect Chloe who sees any pristine surface as a canvas to cover in her black marker and who screams at her parent and fails her classes. She can't talk her way out of a wet paper bag, that much was obvious but she's willing to do anything to get what she wants, no matter how much it could hurt her or what anyone thinks of her. So they stay together.

Chloe finds Victoria trying to drug Rachel so she can take over her role and Rachel suggests giving her the spiked drink instead. Chloe doesn't think much about it until the other students freak out over Victoria's collapse. Everyone's rushing around to help her, the teacher is trying to call for medical support and barely hides his shocked horror at Rachel's empathy lacking suggestion for Chloe to just take Victoria's place in the play. But any red flags this whole situation raises for Chloe are pushed aside, Rachel is very convincing in her reasoning that it will keep the students busy and the pandemonium to a minimum while Victoria is treated for 'whatever caused her to pass out' and everything else disapears when, despite mangling her way through the Tempest, Rachel looks at her like she does and talks to her of their future. They're in front of a whole audience but it's just the two of them, the girl running from her expectations and the girl who had failed all hers but was still loved by the other anyway. They're going to run away together, promised with a kiss or a bracelet, or a tattoo, they can leave everything else behind.

But when they go to collect their things, Rachel's parents are home, and no matter what Chloe does, hell breaks loose and Rachel learns the truth of what she saw the other day. Another part of her seemingly perfect life, another lie. Rachel waxes poetic about the beauty of the night sky coming from dead stars but Chloe doesn't know this isn't true, and why would she even ask? 

They're too young to realize the way her father tried to keep her busy being 'perfect' was an attempt to keep her away from the fate of her biological mother, even if it caused far more damage than intended. They're so young they don't think about Victoria, who woke up sicker than any hangover she's ever had and absolutely terrified, swearing she would never go near those kinds of drugs again. They don't think about how they affect each other.

Rachel has been using Chloe for her own gains, absolutely and undoubtable fact, but when Chloe stands on the train tracks and waits as the train gets closer and closer, Rachel panics and cries out. It startles Chloe enough that the train nicks her clothes and sends her tumbling rather than stepping off cooly like shes used to. Chloe lands on her back, looking up at the train that got closer to killing her than ever before and the adrenaline rips giddy raucous laughter from her, and interrupts Rachel about to lay into her. The player can choose to kiss Rachel in her joy, and only they can see Rachel wipe the tears from her eyes after as Chloe is too wrapped up in her euphoria.

Rachel knows Chloe will help her find her biological mother. Chloe would do anything for her, at any cost to herself, though that doesn't seem to be much of a reach for the self destructive Chloe anyway. Yet when they follow their only lead Rachel is the one hurt and hospitalized.

Maybe this is an advantageous position though, Chloe is sent rifling through the DA's office, barely escaping capture and Rachel is able to calm her down when, for a brief moment, Chloe is shaken. Her anxieties are easily pushed aside, Chloe doesn't WANT to believe that the girl she loved was manipulating her. Again, she ignores the red flags and doesn't notice Frank visiting Rachel in the hospital or the relationship they develop.

Instead, she finds that the same man who hurt Rachel was hired by Rachel's Father to kill her bio mother. Chloe once again races into danger for Rachel, goes right up against the man who had just sent her friend to hospital. But this is where the development of the "backtalk" segment comes in. After all her time with Rachel, she's developed some of the biting wit she's know for from the original game. The gameplay just about whether or not you can distract Damon long enough to not injecting Rachel's year-sober mother with what she's been trying so hard to kick. I don't know if it changes much other than the conversation you have with the bio mum at the end but it could change some factors for the later decision you have to make.

After Frank kills Damon, do you listen to Sera and keep Rachel's father's actions a secret from her so she can stay in a somewhat stable household for a little longer? Do you tell her the truth, no matter how much it could hurt her especially given how destructive she's been just from what she's learnt so far?? How could you ever ask a 15 year old to bear this burden of responsibility??? But it is asked of Chloe and she chooses.

It's the end of the game now. No matter your choice, Chloe and Rachel stay together. Their attachment to each other is even more now thanks to what they went through together. Chloe is unhealthily obsessed with Rachel, taking every perceived frustration to heart and flagellating herself for it. Rachel knows this and feels the burden of keeping Chloe's mental health in check, fearing if she set boundaries then Chloe wouldn't cope and would hurt herself. Rachel's manipulation gets meaner as she takes her frustrations out on Chloe, which causes Chloe's mental health to decline and becomes even more dependent on Rachel.

The vicious cycle builds and grows until Chloe finds a text Rachel receives from one of her other partners. The confrontation is huge and brutal, Chloe begins to realize how much she's been pulled around and is vicious, telling Rachel how she's a fundamentally imperfect and cruel person who needs to manipulate people into giving her affection because she'd never be able to receive it genuinely. Rachel also says the thing Chloe is terrified of and asks her how she could blame Rachel for needing some support when Chloe is just a blackhole of emotional burden, sucking everyone's joy out of them in a never ending attempt to fill the holes in herself. The culmination of neglected mental illness and their own toxic relationship creating damage so obvious and potent that we DON'T need another fucking forest fire symbolism. It ends with Amber running off leaving Chloe alone.

Chloe breaks down, alone again. Her rage and hurt is quickly overcome but unrelenting guilt, surely everything is her fault again. Her worthless self fucking it up for everyone, especially the one she loves so much. She desperately searches for Rachel, trying to find her and apologize, fix it all so it can go back to what they had.

She doesn't find Rachel until that day with Max in the junkyard.

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I will probably get asked "why would you want to make their relationship so toxic and abusive? Why would you do this to them? Can't lesbians/wlw have fucking ANYTHING??" That's a fair thing to ask but, to be honest, it recontextualizes Chloe's behavior in the first game. The flaws that she was criticized for (being abrasive, manipulative, uncaring toward anything but the search for Rachel) are understandably influenced by the traumatic codependant relationship she had barely finished experiencing! It also recontextualises so much of the original game that can be touched upon in an epilogue following the main events of the prequel.

Let's imagine how this change would affect the main game

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Obviously on the smaller scale, a lot of the criticized behavior Chloe exhibited toward Max are clearly just what she learnt was how to treat people she cares about through her experiences with Rachel. Her wit, too, was inspired and taught by Rachel, maybe even in an explicit scene they include in the game (cos cmon, they really don't have much

But think about Chloe's search for Rachel, with the context of the final fight they had. How desperately she was trying to find her, not just because she loved her though of course she did. But so she could apologize or even get proof that what Rachel said about her was wrong. And then imagine how much worse she feels when she finds her dead.

Chloe realizes Rachel died all those months ago, after their fight. Rachel went off to find solace and reassurance from Jefferson. How could chronic self-blamer Chloe do anything but truly believe she pushed Rachel toward the men who killed her? Not only did she lose the first woman who returned her romantic affection and was the sole cause for any emotional regulation she had recently, as tumultuous as it was, but now she thinks she killed her. 

Chloe refers to the tornado descending on Arcadia Bay as "Rachel's Revenge". What if she thinks the revenge is toward her? Of course she tells Max to go back and let her die. All of this is because Max kept trying to save her, but she's so far beyond saving. She sees herself as a gaping black hole that will suck everything down into the depths with her, irredeemable, broken, endless-mistake making Chloe. Rachel knew it too and now, because Chloe wouldn't just die when she was supposed to, everyone else is paying for it. 

Chloe is scared to die. It's why all those times where she got close made her feel so strongly. But she already thinks shes selfish and so all she asks of Max is to remember her. So all of this wasn't for nothing.

But in one ending, Max doesn't sacrifice Chloe. In one of her endings, Max sees all the damage that jumping all over the timeline has caused, it's bearing down upon them as they speak, how the hell is the solution to this to just use her powers once again??? Seriously????? No.

Chloe's stunned by Max's choice but it's not until they've been driving in silence for a while that she starts to question it. She can't help it, she asks Max why? After everything she put Max through, after all she did to her mum, she pushed Rachel to her death, Max, didn't she deserve to finally be swallowed up herself?

They had to stop the car and now Max looks at her with eyes so much older than they were a week ago, haunted by all the deaths and all the mistakes she had made for herself. Her powers and her decisions just killed the entire town they had grown up in, but why was she ever given the chance to do that? Chloe, Max, and Rachel were just kids. None of them had the experience or the capacity to handle any of the responsibilities they had been burdened with. Chloe should never have been left to fester in her own grief alone as it grew onto those she loved too, Rachel should never have been pushed to an impossible standard until the only way she could possibly keep up appearances was to manipulate others into believing it, and Max should never, ever been given the ability to tear reality apart while she desperately tried to find her future among protecting her past. They had made so many mistakes yes but they should never have been put in the position for those mistakes to cause the damage they did.

Chloe and Max fucked up. Irreparably. All they can do is accept their mistakes and try to make sure they never ever do it again. They owe it to themselves to just get better, and maybe to those they lost too.

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if you read all almost3000 words of this blog post, thank you! i hope you enjoyed it!! it took me a day and a half to write all these thoughts down and, i'm sure you're not surprised to hear this, refuse to reread it to edit because its been almost 7 hours since i continued writing this from the night before!!! i'm tired and want to do something else with my day!!!! but also i absolutely could not until i got these thoughts out of my brain.

before the storm is not a good game. if you enjoyed it then hell yes everything is subjective! but it does not add anything important to recontextualize the events of the second game. i actually played them both with my best friends just after high school and, honestly, we hated both of the games BUT i've had a lot of time to think on them and i think the games, like the characters of the game, were just a bit naive and a little misguided. 

the video essays i watched with my darling patient girlfriend made me reevaluate those thoughts i've had about the game for years, even though i've changed a lot since then. i liked coming at old memories with the experiences i have now, a mid 20s adult who's had thousands of dollars of therapy to process my own trauma. i wanted to throw some of that to chloe, who's known for her role as an inherently doomed, tragic figure. i dunno, just take this post from me, maybe i'll look back on it later to make a bloody video essay but until then i hope it's still something.

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