💚 diary #7 ❤️ 6/7/2024 💚

i feel like i'm writing this a little early, but i'm writing this actually kind of late

today was super chill. i didn't do a lot except wake up late.... to a text from the lady who works at this pharmacy who wanted to give me an internship. and i FREAKED out. like i don't really want a job rn and i was really, really hoping she would just forget. but i can't just ignore her because i probably DO want this internship, and i didn't know what to say. so i decided i'd ask my parents for what to say, since i didn't really know what i wanted. and i went downstairs, barely awake, and told them. and my dad actually got super mad at me and just said "be bold already and say what you want. yes or no."

i hate when he gets like this, because i just wanna run away and hide, and he just looks at me expecting me to say something. when really i have nothing to say. and if i DO say anything, he gets angry at me for saying the wrong thing or whatever. so i just stay quiet but sometimes that makes him more angry. idk what to do at this point. i feel like my dadmight actually have anger issues sometimes

so anyhow..... he told me what to say while i made my breakfast. and i told her i was interested but needed more info AND THEN SHE WANTED TO SCHEDULE A MEETING </3 </3 </3 so I'll h ave to do that at some point. Now that I think about it, I didn't reply to that text............. I will worry about it later because I don't want to rn

so anyway my friend/roommate's mom FOUND A KITTEN TODAY IN HER YARD. so my friend is gonna keep it when she moves into her new apartment. she thinks it;s a girl and it's a little tiny cute brown tabby and it's SO little and scrawny and tiny...... i told her to name it Toby lol

then i had to sign up to attend the meeting for VBS... since they're bringing food. I want to bring cookies to the lady bringing food but I'm scared that she's gluten free. a weird amount of people at my church are gluten free

then my friend found this super rare $100 dollar svtfoe funko pop for ONE DOLLAR at a garage sale. I was so jealous lol

ugh and my sistger's sickness turned into a cold finally. she's been blowing her nose and sniffling all day and it's annoying but i know she can't do anything about it. I hope I don't get sick either

I made some study materials today, like flashcards. i really want to get a one hundred on all my tests, and i love organic chemistry so i think this will be really easy

friended some new people.,. one of them ended up unfriending me, and i thought it was because i forgot to read their byf (which to be fair wasn't posted when i friended them so), but it turns out they deactivated their account soooooo whatever

played a lot of minecraft murder mystery...... started to redesign my light goddess oc. for some reason i'm having a hard time designing her but i have to get it done soon for minecraft server reasons. i'm hoping poppy can help me a little bit at least

i didn't talk to her much today but i think she was busy 

uhhhh my sister dropped her bowl of soup on the stairs so we had to clean it up. but the soup for dinner had little star shaped noodles and the breadsticks my mom made were awesome

i made some new friends on murder mystery. they were really nice. one of them was like "HEY stop running away from me" since we were alone in a lobby. it was cool to actually talk to folks for once :)

i kinda wanna change my minecraft ign to some variant of holidaygirl1225 or snowgrave route but my current one is SO good i don't wantanyone taking it 

watched a really good character analysis of noelle today...... it was a series and i'd seen the rest of them but not the one for her ????? anyyway it was really in depth. i think it's interesting how the same thing can be read a lot of different ways and yet still fit a character

that whole video i was like "omg just like me fr" </3

learned that her theme has gaster motif in it too ?????

i consumed a lot of deltarune youtube content today lol

also found some halloween pencils and candy cane chapstick in the junk drawer while looking for christmas ones....... the candy cane one is just minty though. candy cane should be sweet and minty and not just mintiness!!!!!!!

anyway cringe culture is dead

HAHA I JUST WON A GAME BY HIDING THE WHOLE TIME AND BEING THE LAST INNOCENT ALIVE

now im the murderer. Awesome.

and i died :(

idk why it hurts so bad to lose </3 maybe i should stop playing this game

i'm also gonna make a candy cane body scrub since i didn't buy one at target. i want it to be christmas already !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

okay well, gonna get food, maybe go to bed early...... i feel really lonely and REALLY bad for some reason

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Listening To: Toby Fox - ASGORE
Mood: Sad
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------