My being ramble

Hi this is really the first time Im really posting about my inner thoughts and feelings in a public space. I'd like to preface this with I'm a pretty to myself person advertising myself as outgoing.

In short I feel like I have being  (if that makes sense). Its like Im a hollow shell that can function as a perceived person. It feels like I'm constantly screaming in my head, but I'm only surrounded by silence on the outside even in a crowd. When I do speak I rarely felt heard outside of my partner its like my words pass through people.

I talk to my self in my head a lot but it don't think that really counts as being heard lol

I dunno I just feel like I have zero impact on the world around me. I'm not talking about changing the whole world, I would just like to be able to be able to felt by those around me.

Sharing my feelings has become almost nonexistent because of this, like what the point of sharing myself with anyone if it doesn't matter. I also feel like that's my problem too, and its frustrating and makes me wan to break down at the end of each day when I'm talking to myself.

I have tons of interests and likes can speak about them to people no problem, but that its never feels like personal connection. Personal connections is what I lack in the world, heck the ones I do have can be counted on my hands, and even then I still run into the above mentioned  issues.

So I dont know really what to do other then wake up and move through the day. If you read this far thanks for listening to my ramble I appreciated it. Come chat with me if you want to or if you need someone to listen to you.