Idk how to end this

Now i'm feeling so much shit, i don't really know what's making me feel worse. Im away from home, im still in Colombia and god i wish i could go back to Venezuela, i miss there, i miss everything i had there, my friends, my room, my family, i haven't been feeling good and that has really drained me, all i can do ALL day is cry, i try to not feel this way, but everything keeps getting worse and worse, it's like life is giving me more and more reasons to hate being alive. I hate that i'm 17 now, i hate that i'm not 16 anymore, i hate the fact that i'm growing up and i'm not doing shit with my life. Certainly i haven't been feeling well, but it keeps getting worse and worse... my dream was to graduate with my classmates, the only classmates i've known since middle school, since the first year of middle school until the second to last year of highschool, i really regret leaving my country. They are now graduating, they are getting their shirts signed by their friends, they are celebrating that they are graduating, which was my dream since i started middle school. I always watched those last year highschoolers celebrating bc they were close to their graduation, i always saw them planning their prom, choosing the design for the prom shirt, and on their last day of school i always saw how they all went to the central courtyard of the school and they started to jump, shout, dance, hug, smile, cry, enjoy the moment of the last day of highschool. I always waited with excitement for my turn, i always said to myself "one day i'm gonna experience that", but now i'm here, alone in my room, watching on facebook or ig my ex classmates photos of that day, and i haven't stopped crying since then. I should be there enjoying too, i should be there graduating too, i should be there taking pictures with them, but i'm not and i feel so so so sad. I feel sad bc i know there's nothing i can do anymore, i wish i could rewind the time to stop me from coming to Colombia, bc i'm suffering to much here, i'm away from everything i love and everything i enjoy. I had to uninstall facebook bc i kept seeing those photos of them celebrating their last day of school and i hate how much it hurts when i see i'm not there, everytime i see a pic related to that i start crying so hard that my eyes get swollen. Idk what to do anymore bc basically there's nothing i can do, when i think i finally got over it, i just start crying again. It's sad bc i will never get to experience that, something that i've dreamed about since i was 12, i hate how my life is going, i hate being here crying all day, i hate not being there with my friends planning a party for when we get oficially gratuated, i hate my life. The only thing that brought me joy was going to school and spend time with people i love, but now i don't have anything, i have nothing. Only if there was a way to do it all right againg, but there is not... i think it's only gonna get worse from here. Please god, if you're up there watching me, help me clear my mind and help me feel better, i can't take it anymore, at this point i'm fighting with my thoughts to stay alive, please, help me. It's hard bc i can't express in how much pain i'm everyday through this writing , but i hope you understand