MCR4EVA!!!!!!

Hey there!!! I know nobody reads these, and that's just fine. I think it's more for me to look back on honestly, but if someone else reads them I don't mind. Now, I've been an MCR fan for years now(since about 6th grade if my memory serves me right). Their music has always interested me, but I was never, like, a super fan or anything....until now. It was late on a cold February night earlier this year. I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to sleep. This all-encompassing, nagging feeling was tugging at me from deep within, keeping me wide awake. Worse still, I didn't know why, or what it wanted. I got the sudden urge to watch the "I'm Not Okay" music video, something I had seen many a time before. It was more than an urge really, it felt as if I physically HAD to do it. I oblige, not sure why I was feeling so strongly about it out of seemingly nowhere. As soon as the video starts, I am immediately overcome by an emotion I've never felt before:it's strong, almost overwhelming. It almost makes me want to cry. It feels like a strong longing of some-kind, mixed with the satisfaction of reaching a much sot-after epiphany. I stayed up the rest of the night watching video after video of MCR content, from the Making of the Video segments that used to play on FUSE, to different interviews they did throughout the years. since then, they've had a complete choke-hold on me, and I am completely obsessed with their music. Quite honestly, I haven't been this happy or inspired in a very, very long time. I think that, maybe, on that fateful night, I made up my mind on a matter that had been plaguing my thoughts for quite some time: what am I going to do with my life? My answer? Music. I truly and honestly believe that the only way I can live a fulfilling life is by pursuing music. I know that MCR is known as "the band that saves live" or whatever, and that so many people show up to shows with homemade shirts saying that and whatnot, but I believe it's true. There's something so awful and terrifying about living life without hope, without a plan what-so-ever. This time last year, hell, just six months ago, if I tried thinking about the future, I would give up right away, because I couldn't stand the fact that I saw nothing for myself. I saw no future, no hope. It's different now, though, and I'd like to thank every member of MCR for that. Once again, I know it's been said a million times by now, but I truly mean it when I say that this band saved my life.