Letters for Elysia. 6

Dear Elysia,

What happened yesterday must really have marked you again, your tears flooded my vision and your nails deformed my face, my face fell apart with all that nocturnal panic that emanated from your body in an early and agile way, we should be more careful with these frequent attacks of yours, shouldn't we? Those words were bitter... But incredibly comforting, so cosy that they changed your mind so quickly, didn't they? Or is it just another feeling of guilt that has arisen? These are questions I often ask myself, darling, whether we like it or not, we're interconnected and everything that affects you affects me indirectly.

When we read about the supposed ‘Love’ it made me think and conclude that if someone starts to like you in less than five months, they've probably seen someone in you that they haven't got over yet. Which triggers my fear of getting hurt again. I caught you thinking about this and how complicated love really is, I understand the anxiety about finding someone, after all, as much as we all already have in mind the fact that we're going to die alone, that doesn't take away the fear of not loving and being loved by someone until then.

I need to say goodbye, the train is already arriving at the station... And let your friend know that my letters aren't sad, they're just words from the soul.

Love, Subconscious. (06.02.24)