Toxic Blues

I worked retail long ago. Granted, in todays world, retail workers get treated like shit. Back then, we had to worry more about our employer(s). 

Young and dumb... no license, no car... not in school. I needed a job. --- My mother told me I needed to be working. 

Back then, if you were young and attractive, you'd get to work at this retail store with ease. I believe minimum wage was $5.15. I walked in... music blaring and cigarette smoke dancing in the air. "Can you start now?!"

So, feeling like I have achieved Nirvana.. I felt excited/inspired... I was a working girl!

I quickly found out that many of the managers felt that they could do and say... treat us any kind of way that they saw fit. 

My schedule was full time. I worked open-close Fridays and Saturdays. 10am-9pm. But we were young, we could hack it. Holidays were much worse. "NO ONE CALLS OFF! NO ONE REQUESTS OFF! OPEN TO CLOSE!" -- This included Black Friday and the entire week leading up to X-Mas. 

The mall closed at 6pm X-Mas eve... but the greed of the managers meant that they would keep us open as long as possible. The police had to come and shut the store down... it was X-Mas eve.... after all. 

Once we closed, the head manager gathered us all.... thinking we were going to get cash bonuses---- I mean... we worked over a week straight. But instead, he told us that we were WORTHLESS...that we did NOTHING. Hindsight is a mo'fo, because not a single one of us quit... because we had gotten used to the toxicitity. Angry tears in my eyes.. but I felt I couldn't quit, because I had a car note and other bills to pay.

I STAYED TOO LONG!

Sexual harassment was plenty! I was offered 5K to marry an illegal so they could get their green-card .... 3 different times.... 3 different men. Because if anything, they always liked to put you in your place and make you feel like you couldn't do any better. 

I STAYED TOO LONG!!!

Once I had to work at a different store, so I had to leave my car at the one store I always worked at. I was supposed to be helping this manager move clothes to another store... But instead, he took me to his apartment and tried to have sex with me. He tried giving me a massage, and was hard while doing it. I politely rejected his advances... of which there were many. 

Looking back... I'm angry that I stayed as long as I did. Everything but the friendships that I made, were toxic. The entire operation of how they treated us.... less than. 

#MeToo