Some random stuff in my head I guess

I haven't logged in in awhile and I noticed that I never wrote a blog here even tho I spend like 5 hours in a discord call doing my profile with friends so now that I remembered that this account exists I wanted to write a bit he he :D I don't really like to talk in the internet I think I am more like an espectator idk why online interactions scare me even more than irl ones.

so I noticed that my account will be one year old in about a month, I was thinking "oh that's a lot I haven't noticed that this much has passed". During that time I just got into university and I was struggling (idk why my introverted dumb self thought that it was a good idea to study comunications) also the fact that I never was the type of person to go out and *DO STUFF* , talk with new people, etc.

but idk I try to be kind with myself in that stuff, people always pressured me to get out of my comfort zone and I also wanted to be better?? (in what? idk). I still wish that I could have choose a more artistic path in my career but comunications has been really cool and taught me a lot. I met really cool people and I feel like I know myself better. 

Since now I am an adult™ my parents put less attention to how I dress and how I do my life (really cool living life without a fly in your ear telling you what to do constantly) still the switch is really funny. I cut my hair and bought new clothes, I always wanted to look androgynous and man I fucking love it!!! and I finally fulfilled my dream to dress like a twewy/kh2 character irl, really cool.

Also some close friends were so fucking lovely during that time and supported me a lot with trying to get used to uni life

So yeah is rlly fucking weird but things got better for me, not really used to that. Of course I still have my struggles (I'm sure I'm writing this positive because I am in one of my sudden out of nowhere good moods, last week I was a mess xddd) and uni still is fucking hell but also a lot of good stuff has happened so I don't mind it that much. 

Rn I can't go to uni because of a strike (public school lets gooo) and my mood has not been too good (bed rotting noooo)  so yeah, now I have a new problem, seems like I can't be productive if there is no deadline or an external pressure, like telling myself to do stuff is not enough. I've been procastinating so much which sucks, I want to play kingdom hearts DDD so bad but I don't feel like I deserve it D: so idk maybe writing this will pressure me to do stuff (if I don't update in the next week that I finished all my assigments then anyone who has read this far, may please make fun of me)

anyways this goes nowhere xd also my english is not really good so I'm having trouble exlaining myself. Here is some random drawings I did in class (fun fact you get really better at drawing when you are sitting in a boring class for hours)

so yeah uni is kind of fun, you learn cool stuff and also suffer