ughhh

so much shit irl is exacerbating my entire life. i feel more dead than i already am. i don't feel great mentally, i can't take proper care of myself, my parents pulled me through a trap, being one of the reasons as to why i left my old job (even though it was already quite shit to begin with), and now they bash me and insult me for it, when i am struggling to keep up with college work due to motivation, and also me being out of money. i had to sell my xbox on ebay, and even then i can't pay the priority shipping fees right now, but i'm trying my best to at least get that done, since i'm going to be getting 150$ in total, which will help me with some stuff for a good while.

here's to hoping that i don't lose my car and possibly get kicked out by my religious latino parents and go homeless for a while

i might run away and leave in secret though when i have the chance. after i graduate, i'm going to try and see if i can at least get an apartment in the greater boston area, or hopefully in the neighborhood of east boston (since that's where i'm from), right at the moment when the housing "market" crashes. once everything there is set up, i'm going to immediately start planning when to move my stuff out and ship my stuff over there, and then afterwards i'm going to buy a plane ticket directly to Boston, hopefully when my parents are travelling somewhere for the week perhaps, and cut them off completely and change my number and everything attached to my old life.

then i can finally start looking towards getting started on hrt, along with some other stuff that i have in mind, such as getting my girlfriend over there to be with me as well, since she lives in texas (which is also a horrible state to live in for various reasons if you're lgbtq+)

but yeah, just kinda a bit of rambling and stuff. thanks for reading