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Meanwhile... this isn't specifically about visuals nor racing..
And I should of left it at that, instead of trying to make amends, but until I can replace those neural pathways, it's going to loop on repeat whenever I remember.
I resolved my perspective and said more than anyone else could have.. but its a two way thing left uncertain, so my mind keeps getting hung up on the past, as if resolving it for a thousandth time would make any sort of difference.
It didn't to her... and shes the one who messed up... gratuitously.
No matter how many times I try to end things well... she's incapable of it.
One shouldn't presume the worst, but the worst happened... and she betrays herself to waste her life.
My exceptional ability to recover and get back at it for someone, hasn't been put to better use...
And I would be wrong to regret it.
At least I won't have to forget important memories to ditch the bad ones... since they were of different hers & different "me's".. words don't exist for the precedents we set.
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SubtleTsc
We meet up again recently, but we both blew things up... and the dust still hasn't settled.
I was ill and shouldn't have agreed to meet when I did... after someone treated her poorly and with disrespect, she went off on me. Which sounds like a bigger deal than it really was...
To be fair, I could have prevented the whole situation multiple times leading up to that.
I was too laid back and on autopilot because of being sick.
I am not going to get into the rest of it in this comment. I am omitting alot, as I cannot give this more attention right now... and would rather focus on positive things.